The Economics of Jennifer Anniston

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-By Caleb Jones

Recently I was listening to a radio show where they were reporting on Jennifer Anniston's recent remodel of her house. She and her husband were doing things like relocating entire stairways, adding on multiple wings, etc.

The entire cost of this little remodel was $21 million.

One of the commentators immediately went into the predictable tirade about how horrible it was that Jennifer Anniston would have the audacity to spend that kind of money on something as frivolous as a home remodel. It was ridiculous, he said. There's no way her and her husband are actually doing to "use all that crap". It was also completely "unfair" that any one person should be "allowed" to have all that money, and spend that money on such a "ridiculous" thing.

Look, I don't even like Jennifer Anniston. I think she's extremely overrated, not nearly as pretty as everyone thinks, and is a very boring actress who plays the same exact character in every movie she's in. (With the one exception of Horrible Bosses; she was actually pretty funny in that one.)

Regardless, I am now going to explain to you, and to this gentleman on the radio, why Jennifer Anniston deserves every penny of that $21 million and should be more than welcome to spend it in any way she chooses.

1. She has personally entertained millions of people over the course of 20 years. Whether you like it or not, there is a very real monetary, market value for entertainment. The free market demands entertainment, so those who entertain large amounts of people get paid a lot of money, and thus deserve it. It's a matter of volume and rendered value. They are providing a service to the marketplace, in a very high-volume way, that society greatly values.

2. For many years, Anniston was literally Hollywood's most profitable actress. That means because of her, thousands upon thousands of people working in Hollywood, as well as all the connected industries all over the world, owed their jobs to her efforts. Hollywood isn't going to make movies and TV shows unless they know they'll make money, and because of profitable celebrities like Anniston, massive numbers of jobs are created and kept.

It would be very interesting to calculate the number of people who literally owe their jobs to Jennifer Anniston. I don't know what the number is, but based on the amount of money she earns for Hollywood, I do know the number is huge.

3. Anniston is a bigtime philanthropist. She has donated millions upon millions of dollars to many different charities. I really wanted to ask this guy on the radio how much money HE'S donated to charity. Millions of dollars? Okay, okay, not millions. How about just one million? No? Half a million? No?

I would be shocked if it was more than $10,000 in his entire frickin' life, if that. What right does he have to say that Anniston can't spend a few million on her house?

She has more than earned that right. You don't have to like it, but those are the facts.

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