I admit, over the last decade or so, I was fully beta male even if I had my own company.
Of course, I didn’t know it then: I was living the way I was raised to be and my wife was slowly
drifting away from me. We even got separated on quite a few occasions for a few days or a few
weeks.
About 3 years ago, my wife discovered Blackdragon’s site and quickly presented it to me
as the way to rekindle our marriage and stop our problems. I was skeptical, but I kept reading.
I read his Alpha Male 2.0 e-book as soon as it came out in late 2014 and it hit me like a
ton of bricks, especially the financial parts.
I realized I wasn’t properly managing my company at ALL! I was taught that the strength
of a company rested in its employees and as such, I was struggling to pay 5 full time employees
while being 3 years late on paying my own salary. Worse, during the whole of 2013, I didn’t
make myself a single paycheck.
We were in effect living on my wife’s salary and on our credit cards as I was working
overtime to pay my employees, which I can tell you is really great for NOT showing your wife
you are a provider. My stubbornness to keep my employees had already made us lose our house
a few years earlier without me lighting up!
The first thing I did after reading the Alpha Male 2.0 book was fire 4 of my employees
and convert the 5th one (the only one I really needed) as a sub-contractor allowing him to run his
own side-business. I also “fired” a few of my clients which didn’t bring any real profits but
which had kept my employees busy while I worked on the real money makers.
I began offering new subscription-based services to bring stable revenues, inspired from
the Alpha Male 2.0 book. I wouldn’t say it’s a major success yet, but my customer base is
growing and any new customer adds recurring revenues to my profit margin.
I had expected my company to crash and burn if I ever lost my employees and yet, within
4 months of the downsizing I was once again making a profit and by now, I have resumed to
make myself regular paychecks not just for the current months but also to slowly cash-in some of
my back pay to reimburse our debts. In just two years I cleared over $50,000 in debt just by
saving on paychecks made to my employees, and we can now afford to send our child to a great
private school.
Additionally, instead of working every evening, I began applying Caleb’s 7 key areas
philosophy to add more depth to my life.
I am reading again, I am having fun again and I even laugh and smile for the first times in
years. I decided to re-kindle the relationships with my friends and slowly, it’s working. They are
starting to call me again like they used to in the past.
I am also in better shape thanks to the exercises I added to my key areas weekly
worksheet and I am almost back to my college weight.
My wife had kept pushing me to recreate the two times in our relationship I had a “side-
woman”: once in college and later when we separated for a few weeks and I made a new
girlfriend. At the end of that relationship, I was then seeing both women with both knowing
about it. But I still was a beta then. To me, they were happy accidents, not designed on purpose.
And yet, that’s how my wife realized that this is the way she wanted to live. With a man
who doesn’t depend on her. With an Alpha Male 2.0.
So, I created a profile on OKCupid. I didn’t contact 300 women like Caleb
recommended, I only contacted 23, and got regular replies from 14 of them. I spoke on the phone
to 6 of them with 5 agreeing to a date. I think that’s actually slightly better odds than Caleb
himself, which gave me a lot of confidence.
I went on 3 dates and almost on a 4th one (the woman was from out of town and got lost
driving to the great café I had selected and was afterwards too ashamed to resume contact due to
how panicking she sounded on the phone while lost).
The fifth one moved to Belgium on a whim in the mean time. Yeah, that sounded like an
excuse but she posted pictures from Bruxelle’s police presence in her street after the Paris
attacks.
In short, out of 23 women I cold-contacted, 5 agreed to a date and I got 3 dates. That’s
not bad at all! I actually met 13% of all of the women I contacted in OkCupid.
Sadly, I live in Québec which is one of the most feminist places in North America. It
doesn’t make finding a women open to Caleb’s suggestions impossible, but sure makes it more
difficult.
Two of the dates were horrible. I couldn’t place a word with one and the other was
actually a professional dominatrix looking for wealthy guys to pay her money so she could beat
them up. None of this is on per profile, by the way…
The third date could have worked, but I decided not to pursue it as per the timeless “don’t
put your dick in crazy” rule. I won’t elaborate, but she was quite a number.
I was trying to adapt my technique when Caleb began talking about Testosterone
Replacement Therapy.
I went to see my doctor and discovered I was flush with the minimum numbers for an
adult male (meaning for guys up to 25 years older than I was).
I began a quest to find a doctor ready to help me like Caleb was helped, but even if we
have full medical coverage, I couldn’t find a single doctor ready to help me out. To them, this
was not a medical problem.
Still, I found testosterone booster vitamins and my sex drive rose to the point where my
wife and I are once again having sex almost every night as if we were newlyweds again.
Let’s talk about drama. One of the things that turned me on to my wife was her almost
complete lack of drama (as defined by Caleb) in our daily life. When I became a full on beta
male, which coincides to my wife’s early-thirties, drama arrived by the front door and seemed to
establish itself as our new method of communication.
By applying Caleb’s techniques and those in the excellent book “The Surrendered Wife”
by Laura Doyle, drama episodes reduced in intensity at first, then in frequency to the point where
it’s once again mostly absent from our life.
Today, I am still looking for the perfect way to find women, tailored to my unique
geographic area, but with Caleb’s books and articles, I am convinced I’ll find a way, one day or
another.
After all, the rest of my life is so much more in order thanks to his writing.