Reading Time – 6 minutes

Below is a recent comment from my YouTube channel. I’ve edited it slightly to remove some irrelevant context from the video. Still, it perfectly highlights the questions, emotions, and concerns thousands of men have relayed to me over the years.

This is regarding when a long-term woman leaves and men experience similar if not worse irrational reactions. I can say that even without oneitis and having other women in my life, the feelings of loss when someone you really care about leaves really messes with your head. Like all that work just getting that relationship to that point goes right down the drain. And more so the work involved in bringing in her replacement. This feeling makes men want to “fix” the current relationship or chase her which the exact opposite of what we should do. Men actually reduce the odds of her returning by doing this.

Your first reaction is that this guy is being a pussy or a beta. And yes, I would classify those feelings as “beta” as well.

However, the problem is that this accurately and precisely encapsulates the biological and societal default setting of how men feel when a woman leaves them.

This is, indeed, exactly how men are “wired” to feel: sad, desperate, hopeless, a feeling of wasted time and investment, and needy.

If he’s an Alpha Male 1.0, also add the emotions of anger and disrespect.

Obviously, if a monogamous beta male or Alpha Male 1.0 experiences these feelings, he will, just as the commenter above said, do exactly what he’s not supposed to do and pursue the woman to “get her back” or “not let her go,” which is classic oneitis.

This will, again as he correctly observed, drive her attraction for him downward and make the odds even lower that she will ever see him or have sex with him ever again. As always, when it comes to women, sex, and romance, men are programmed to do the opposite of what works in the real world.

This is why the baseline Alpha Male 2.0 technique of when a woman leaves you or does a LSNFTE is you need to just let her go, do nothing, and immediately go radio silent for at least six months to a year. Don’t text her, don’t call her, don’t post anything on her social media. Just vanish like the wind.

This ensures whatever attraction she had for you when she left doesn’t drop even 1%. It heightens the likelihood that you’ll see her again.

This is one of the many reasons why I have a 94% return rate for women who leave me and have maintained that rate for over 17 years. When they leave, which is what women do, I do nothing that lessens the attraction they have/had for me. When they (or I) circle back around six months or a year later (or longer sometimes), she’s primed and ready to see me again instead of thinking, “Oh no, not this fucking guy again.”

But in this article, I’m going to address how to manage the emotions around this. The commenter above is stating that yeah, even if you follow the correct Alpha Male 2.0 techniques, and even if you are having sex with other women, and even if you don’t have oneitis for the woman, most men, especially Alpha 2.0 beginners, will indeed experience feelings of loss and neediness for whatever reasons.

Let’s take the first part of the comment:

The feelings of loss when someone you really care about leaves really messes with your head.

He’s saying “really care about” but I’m going to say oneitis or something close to oneitis.

I’ve said many times that the final level in the Alpha Male 2.0 video game is to achieve full love for a woman without ANY oneitis, not even a hint of it.

I achieved this almost 20 years ago. Today I can fully, 100% love a woman with my entire heart (as I do for Pink Firefly) but have ZERO oneitis for her, and hold both of these conditions in my mind at the same time.

99% of men can’t do this. If they have strong feelings or love for a woman, oneitis is automatic for them. If (or should I say when) this woman leaves them, as the commenter says, “it really messes with your head.”

I love Pink Firefly more than I have ever loved a woman and the love I feel for her is on a spiritual level, and has been for almost a decade. Yet, if she broke up with me tomorrow, I wouldn’t experience anything that would “mess with my head.” I would be disappointed for a few days, maybe 2-3 weeks at the most, and that’s it. My happy life would continue.

I wouldn’t try to pursue her.

I wouldn’t try to compromise with her.

I wouldn’t try to get her back.

I wouldn’t get depressed.

I wouldn’t get distracted with my work (after a few days had passed at least; there might be a momentary disruption only).

I mean it. None of these things would happen. I would nod and say, “Okay, if that’s what you want, I understand,” and just move on.

And… I know she’d have a 94% return rate, so now I really wouldn’t care. This leads to the next part of the comment:

Like all that work just getting that relationship to that point goes right down the drain.

NO! That’s a monogamous mindset, and we Alpha 2.0s don’t live in the monogamous world like the rest of society, thank god.

For normal monogamous men, yeah, once their GF or wife leaves them they’ll probably never going to fuck her again. All that time and effort was indeed washed down the drain. That’s one of the numerous reasons why monogamy is so god damn stupid.

But we Alpha 2.0s don’t have breakups. We have breaks. Breakups are permanent (barring oddball exceptions like with psychopaths like Ben Afflick and J.Lo). But breaks are temporary. That’s what the T in LSFNTE means… TEMPORARY.

It’s true that most Alpha 2.0s aren’t going to have a 94% return rate like me because I’ve been at this for almost 20 years (my 18-year Alpha Male 2.0 anniversary is next month), but return rates of 60% and 70%+ are quite common in our community and increase with practice.

This means that this woman who left you (or is about to leave) has high odds of returning to you someday, meaning you didn’t waste any time building the relationship and nothing went down the drain.

I’ve had many women stay with me for 10+ years if you include LSNFTEs, and that’s even with me moving countries. It’s not that difficult if you follow Alpha 2.0 relationship models.

Here’s the final part of the comment regarding men’s feelings:

This feeling makes men want to “fix” the current relationship or chase her which the exact opposite of what we should do.

Correct, this is what most men want to do, but not the Alpha Male 2.0.

The Alpha 2.0 does a few things to prevent or offset these feelings.

First, he does everything in his power to never get oneitis or even oneitisy tendencies. The original article on how to do this is here and the video masterclass on this is here.

Oneitis IS preventable! You just need to take the time and effort to do what is necessary.

Next, you keep reminding yourself that she’s not leaving you. She’s just taking a break away from you. She’ll be back, motherfucker. Chill! 

Statistically speaking, she’ll follow that same LSFNTE model all women do with Alpha 2.0s. She’ll get tired of you not being monogamous to her or not making her your girlfriend (MLTRs and FBs only; this doesn’t happen with OLTRs), then she leaves you, quickly boyfriend-up a random beta male who kisses her ass, she’ll love it for a few months, a year or two on the outside, then get bored and turned off by his needy beta behaviors, then come back to you.

This could take 6 weeks or it could take 3 years (depending on her age; older women return more slowly), but it will still happen (provided you managed the relationship correctly when you were with her and went radio silent when she left).

Dozens upon dozens of women have done this to me, and many of you, which is why I have a 94% return rate.

So calm down and suck it up; SHE’LL BE BACK!

Lastly, you lean into your other women. Most of the time, even if the woman who leaves you was your favorite, you can quickly promote your second favorite (whom you’ve been thinking about a lot lately) and make her your new favorite. I’ve done this before more than once. Then go back to your roster and resurrect some of your past favorites if you need to. If you still need more women after this, hit the dating apps or daygame/night game and go get one more. Not ten more; one more. Anyone can get one more.

It’s not a big deal.

When you are new or at an intermediate level with Alpha Male 2.0 you need to constantly remind yourself that you don’t live in the monogamous paradigm anymore. All these concerns, worries, and frustrations only apply to beta males and those Alpha 1.0s who eventually surrender to monogamy. We Alpha 2.0s don’t need to worry about any of this crap. It’s only because you’ve lived most of your life as a beta male that you’re “accustomed” to these stupid, useless monogamy-based feelings.

Alpha Male 2.0s live in an entirely different universe.

Thankfully.