Cologne For Men
Believe it or not, a certain percentage of this blog’s regular readers are women. I recently got an email from one of them raising an issue I had never really thought of before. “Jade” writes in and asks:
All this man-wisdom and not one post about cologne??? Shouldn’t it be one of the main things you cover for guys? ….women like cologne you know.
While it’s always extremely dangerous for men to take dating advice from women (since women’s dating advice for men always consists of what women are supposed to say rather than what turns them on), I see no harm in talking about cologne.
My general opinion on cologne is it’s only nessessary if you need it, and a lot of guys don’t need it. It’s more an issue of body odor than of cologne.
Body Odor
Some guys have more body odor than others. Some of is due to external factors like diet and smoking, but frankly most of it is genetics. I am blessed in that I have practically zero body odor at all (I’ll prove that in a minute). However my son, god bless him, has very strong body odor and not the good kind, so he has to be very careful about bathing and wearing cologne. On the other hand, my daughter has no body odor but often has very stinky feet.
And of course, if you’ve had sex with as many women as I have, you learn that some women smell great even without perfume, while other women…um…don’t.
My point is it varies from person to person. If you genetically have strong body odor, then yeah, wear some cologne. Of course I would recommend addressing it in more natural ways (diet, natural oil-free body wash, etc). But I’m not an expert in those areas and really can’t help you there. We’ll talk about cologne selection in a minute.
If you know for a fact you don’t really have body odor, then I would hold off on the cologne except for things like special occasions, first dates, etc. This is what I do, since I don’t have BO.
“Whoa, wait a minute,” you say, “You can’t smell your own body odor so how do YOU know you don’t have BO you Blackdragon bastard?”
Great question. Fortunately I have a great answer. Indeed, it’s very difficult (if not impossible) to smell your own BO, even if it’s really bad. So many years ago when I was still married I conducted a little experiment to find out.
Like all women married to the same man longer than about two or three years, I was married to a woman who instantly complained about anything I did she didn’t like. If I had bad breath, even a little teeny tiny bit, I heard about it immediately.
It’s what wives do, as any married man will tell you. It’s one of the bazillions of disadvantages of being in a traditional monogamous marriage. Women you date are nice and sweet and fun. Women who you’ve been married and monogamous to for more than about three years are pissy, bored and resentful. Just ask any guy who’s been married longer than three years and he’ll tell you all about it. But I digress.
I like to turn negatives into positives, so I used this negative trait as an experiment to see if I actually had “BO”. One day I simply stopped using deodorant. I used to use Speed Stick or Old Spice under my armpits every day. One day, I just stopped. I still showered daily and washed normally. I just stopped all deodorant and cologne. I went all European on my (ex) wife’s ass. Even after exercising, even during sex, I didn’t wear shit. I was totally “au naturel”.
I half expected to get a shitload of complaints about my stinky stinkiness within about two or three days of my lifestyle change. Instead I heard…nothing. Not a single complaint about how I smelled. She complained about all kinds of other shit of course. Like I said, that’s what wives are programmed to do. But not about my smell. Awesome! That was about, oh, ten years ago and I have not worn underarm deodorant since.
Obviously it hasn’t been a problem for my sex life. I had proven my BO was more or less nonexistent, as long as I showered and washed often, which I do. I’m a very clean guy. (With my poly lifestyle, you kinda need to be.)
So I really don’t wear cologne. Sometimes for special occaions I will wear the old style Dolce & Gabbana For Men
I DO make sure to shower daily and usually (but not every time) wash thoroughly with a masculine-scented body wash. My favorite is C.O Bigelow Barber Elixir Black. Their white and red eixirs are also very good. The point is to use a soap-free and oil-free body wash that smells like a man, not like a coconut or margarita, which is what most body washes smell like. You’re man. Smell like one. Leaves the fruity flowery shit for the girls.
By the way, I shouldn’t have to say this, but if you’re regularly having sex with more than one woman (and I really hope you are) make sure you wash your privates very, very well. I don’t care if you always use a condom. Wash that stuff. Well. Be cool about this.
Cologne
Alright, let’s talk about cologne. There are essentially two types of cologne: musky and fruity-gay. Sadly, 80% of the cologne you’ll see on the sample shelves at your local mall or department store will be, you guessed it, the fruity-gay kind. You know the type. It’s the kind of cologne that makes you smell like you just went swimming with Andy Dick and Richard Simmons in a pool full of mangos. I’m not saying these colognes smell bad. They don’t smell bad, they just smell, well…fruity and gay.
As always, you need to be congruent. If you’re a more masculine guy, or a bigger guy, or a tougher guy, or more confident guy, then you should go for the more musky colognes. You know, the old-fashioned kind that make you smell like you just chopped down a tree. With your cock. The Dolce & Gabbana For Men
If you’re a skinnier guy, or a more Russell Brand-type guy, or live in Europe, one of the fruity-gay colognes would probably be best. My favorite of the fruity-gays is Versace Man Eau Fraiche
There would be no point in me listing out a bunch of types and brands of cologne, because you really need to pick the one that smells best to you (and/or perhaps the women in your life). The most important aspect is that you match the type of cologne to the type of man you are. If you’re a more metroseuxal type and you wore one of my musky colognes, it would be weird, just like it would be odd if I wore a REALLY fruity cologne like Blue Seduction
Have fun smelling!
Want over 35 hours of how-to podcasts on how to improve your woman life and financial life? Want to be able to coach with me twice a month? Want access to hours of technique-based video and audio? The SMIC Program is a monthly podcast and coaching program where you get access to massive amounts of exclusive, members-only Alpha 2.0 content as soon as you sign up, and you can cancel whenever you want. Click here for the details.
I’m a little disappointed in this post Blackdragon. Cologne is completely unnecessary for about 90% of us. Wearing cologne makes it look as if you’re trying too hard. Cologne is something I wore 10 years ago when I never got laid (but wanted to). Now = no cologne and get laid whenever I feel like it (usually).
Do you get money from Amazon for referring people to their cologne section?
Not even on first dates is it a good idea, IMO.
I thought I was pretty clear that I usually do not wear cologne. When I wear cologne for first dates (sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t) I make sure I don’t actually “smell” like the cologne, if you know what I mean. It’s there to mask, just in case, not smell. The other 97% of the time I don’t wear cologne. Again, I thought I made that clear.
And yes, I do make money if someone buys something from one of the Amazon affiliate links. Since my primary goal here is to make money, I sincerely hope thousands of people click those links and buy tons of stuff. You know, so I can MAKE MONEY. Any other questions?
Also good: Egoiste by Chanel for men.
And there’s no need to jump out of your skin every time someone mentions money… Maybe he was curious about your business model and was thinking of setting up something similar?
Yes, clearly from the context of his post that’s exactly what he had in mind, N. How silly of me. 🙂
Hey I sampled the Antonio Banderas stuff once and I liked it. Does that make me gay? LOL. Different strokes for different folks I guess.
BTW I agree this hypersensitivity to anyone trying to make money in the seduction community is puzzling.
Keep up the good work, BD.
Cologne is great if you don’t put too much on. Spray it into the air in front of you while you’re shirtless, walk into the mist so it’s on your chest, then put on your shirt. Yes, it looks really gay when you do this, but it gives the perfect amount of scent, i.e. enough for her to smell it when you’re very close, but if you’re standing around with people they won’t smell it, except maybe very faintly.
BD writes: Like all women married to the same man longer than about two or three years, I was married to a woman who instantly complained about anything I did she didn’t like. If I had bad breath, even a little teeny tiny bit, I heard about it immediately.
It’s what wives do, as any married man will tell you. It’s one of the bazillions of disadvantages of being in a traditional monogamous marriage. Women you date are nice and sweet and fun. Women who you’ve been married and monogamous to for more than about three years are pissy, bored and resentful. Just ask any guy who’s been married longer than three years and he’ll tell you all about it. But I digress.
——————————————————————–
Dude, I wish I would have seen this 26 years ago.
I don’t wear any Cologne either. Chicks say that they like the smell of my shaving cream though. When I actually do shave at all!
BD, what do you think about the body odor theory in general, in regards to pheromones and such? I’m not sure if you’ve touched on that before BD? Some guys swear by not showering at all before meeting them! We should do an experiment!
A little off topic, but in regards the affiliate links: I’m in both the Amazon, as well as the E-bay (EPN) affiliate program. Have been for 7 years.
EPN converts better than Amazon, and they pay %50 commission. Check em’ out. I’ve literally made thousands over the years with the crappy site in my user. Ugly sites like mine, have a higher CTR (Click through rate)too!
Cologne is my fav topic, a woman asking about this is like that woman on that turbo tax comercial asking if her elbows are ugly…lol..
First is have good hygiene -> then include body wash sportier the better-> then dress style or comfort image that is congruent to your mood or your style -> once you have these then you can select a Colgone…. right now its blue channel is strong but a lil is just needed smells good manly and not overwhelming..
With respect to BD DolceG doesnt smell good on me and so I dont recomend it..
my favs are 90s cologne that are now abit expensive yet really good.
if you want to skip all this work then go for the most expensive one and wear it and own it. PERIOD.
Yeah, I’ve never talked about that because I know absolutely nothing about it. But if you want to experiment, go for it! 🙂
I’ve been doing a looot of research into cologne. Since I live in Australia, there isn’t much of a selection avaliable and everything’s double the price so I’m kinda screwed, but I make do with what I have.
Context matters with cologne. There’s all these different types and different scents which suit different people. Since I’m a young guy whose target group of chicks are around my age (late teens to early twenties) I can get away with using the fruity gay kind. Chicks love sweet, citrus-y scents, especially the younger ones. Decking myself out in tobaccoish, leathery scents just wouldn’t work on a young buck like me, even though those are the kinds of scents that appeal to me as a person.
A lot of colognes don’t stick on your skin for that long. Most don’t last more than two or three hours. Since there’s only so many types of cologne available, there’s going to be a lot of guys using the same cologne you got. Once chicks smell a cologne they recognise on you, images of guys she’s been with who wore the same kind of cologne as you will start to stir in her mind. Any kind of overpowering clubbing cologne (like Paco Rabanne 1 Million and Jean Paul Gaultier Le Male) is sure to bring up memories of awkward chumps hitting on her.
When I was in school, I used Nautica Voyage for hotter months and Calvin Klein One Shock for cooler months before I changed it over to Burberry London. I always knew that colognes like Davidoff Cool Water and Drakkar Noir to the horror of everyone who came into contact with that foul beast were used by pretty much everyone, so I decided to be a special snowflake and do my research for better affordable alternatives. Nautica Voyage smelled like salty sea breeze and reminded me and other girls of the beach, which they adored.
CK One Shock got me suspended from school. I’m not joking about that shit. That thing reeked of cigarette smoke, but I got it anyway in the hopes it would give me some much needed “edge.” It didn’t. It just made me smell like a chain smoker. I sprayed so much on that teachers thought I took up smoking. They suspended me for “lying”. It was a strict Catholic school who hated me, BTW. They were probs just looking for reasons to kick me out. Chicks didn’t dig it, either. Turns out that one thing they hate about the “bad boy” types is the way they smell. So I smelled like a delinquent when I didn’t act like one. Talk about putting things the wrong way around.
I’m in University right now. I saved up enough pretty pennies to get Chanel Allure Homme Sport for hotter days and Viktor and Rolf Spicebomb for the cooler ones. The thing I like about the Chanel one is that while it’s a citrus-based cologne at heart, it still has hints of earthy, manlier scents. Chicks love it and often tell me I’m the best smelling guy they’ve ever encountered. I picked up Spicebomb because it has a sweetness to its base despite it being all peppery and aftershave-y. It’s the sort of cologne James Bond would wear. Chicks love it.
TL;DR
Oh, yeah, and you don’t want your cologne to be overpowering. Cologne should be discovered, not announced. Cologne has to be subtle. Just one spray at the base of your neck or on both of your wrists does the trick. Those two places I mentioned are where heat radiates from your body, which will bring out the scent of the cologne. And don’t just spray that shit up in the air and walk into it because cologne drops straight to the floor and it won’t reach the warmest parts of your body, which is wear you’d want the cologne to go.