Over the past year and a half, I have regularly received emails and comments at my blogs from men very worried about the #MeToo movement. I get questions like:Â
BD what is your advice about first dates now that #MeToo is a thing???Â
How can I calibrate my daygame to not get in trouble with #MeToo???Â
BD do you still recommend sexual escalation on the second date in the wake of #MeToo??? Isn’t that dangerous now???Â
What about having FBs and MLTRs now that we have #MeToo???Â
Fear of #MeToo is classic false Societal Programming. You hear about all of these horror stories regarding male celebrities over and over again and thus begin to assume that perhaps you too will have your reputation ruined or lose your next movie deal because of #MeToo.Â
But wait. Do you even have a reputation? Are you doing movie deals?Â
Probably not. And that’s my point. Â
#MeToo is a threat for two types of men, and only two types of men. If you are not in either of these categories, #MeToo will not affect you in any way whatsoever. You are 100% safe. No changes needed. Just proceed.Â
Here are those two categories:Â
- Men who work for medium-sized or large companies and regularly hit on women they work with.
- Wealthy public figures.
Those are the two types of men who need to worry about #MeToo. No other man needs to worry about it.Â
If you hit on women you work with, then you’re just flat out stupid. But I’ve addressed men like that already. Please read this article for what I said about men who date women they work with, and please note that I wrote that article in 2011 which was five years before #MeToo ever occurred. The bottom line is that we live in a hypersensitive left-wing society and hitting on women you work with in such a society is a stupid thing to do regardless of whatever is going in with Hollywood celebrities. Â
That brings me to the public figure aspect. Go back over the last five or six men you’ve heard about who have encountered massive problems in their careers because of #MeToo, and you’ll find pretty much all of these guys were either very wealthy, very powerful, very famous, or all three. Â
Are you very wealthy, powerful, and/or famous? Â
No? Â
Then please, for fuck’s sake, stop worrying about #MeToo when you’re on a first date with some random girl you met on Tinder. I hate to break it to you, but you aren’t Bill O’Reilly or Aziz Ansari or Al Franken. Not only are you not rich or famous, but an online first date or street game has nothing whatsoever to do with your workplace, which is mostly what #MeToo is about.Â
Frankly, I am at more risk for problems with #MeToo than 99.9% of anyone in my audience, and I’m barely at risk, because even with one million readers per year, no one knows who the hell I am, nor cares.Â
Now, if you really are a public figure, then yeah, you need to take a few extra precautions, like I did here and here. You should also avoid one night stands like I do, perhaps avoid drugs and alcohol like I do, and be nice to women like I am. Fine. But not one guy who has asked me one of these “oh no what about #MeToo???” questions was a public figure. They were just normal, everyday guys no one gives a shit about that are at zero risk for from any #MeToo problems (again, unless you’re stupid and you hit on women where you work, but if you’re that desperate and dumb then I can’t help you.)Â
This all ties back to a much bigger issue that is common with men in the manosphere and the red pill, MGTOW, and MRA movements in particular. That is, giving much more power to left-wing/feminist movements than they actually have.Â
Women who are professional strippers or hookers very quickly start to operate under very skewed and highly inaccurate views of men because they assault themselves every day with a certain type of disgusting guy. Â
Men do the same thing when they spend day in and day out consuming non-stop content about how horrible or crazy women/feminists/SJWs are. They start walking around assuming that every woman they see is going to call the cops on them if they do anything even close to sexual. This is, of course, not only false, but insane. Â
I’ve been on a number of first and second dates that number well into the triple digits, plus have attempted to have sex with and really did have sex with an extremely high number of women, and most of all of this occurred in one of the most left-wing and feminist-infested cities in North America (Portland, Oregon), and I have literally never had any problem like this in my entire life. Not even close.Â
So please, if you’re one of those guys who walks around terrified and/or angry that every woman out there is ready to rip your balls off and throw you into prison, please read these two articles I wrote a few years back:Â
4 Reasons Feminism Isn’t A ThreatÂ
Feminism Isn’t a Threat – RevisitedÂ
Unless you are a powerful public figure or you’re doing something really stupid, feminism isn’t a threat to you. #MeToo isn’t a threat to you. If you follow Alpha Male 2.0 relationship and financial structures, women aren’t a threat to you. (Women are only a threat to beta males and Alpha Male 1.0s dumb enough to get long-term monogamous or traditionally married.)Â
Seriously, calm the fuck down. Proceed as normal with your normal dating plan and usual relationships. If you become super famous or powerful, then sure, make some adjustments at that time. But for now, chill out and carry on.Â
Be a man.Â
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I thought that metoo wasn’t a thing anymore? It had died out quietly about a year ago after all the ridicule it got.
I do say metoo when I had a bad date or a woman was being bitchy to me, though.
All 100% true. That being said, bad rumors and complaints by women can potentially hurt the ordinary joe. I have had two women address complaints of ‘abusive behavior’ to me. I consider it likely that they would not keep their discontent entirely secret otherwise. Both were women who greenlighted me for sex late at night and I declined (bad logistics, business meeting in the a.m. and similar..) without adequate softening explanations and ego soothing coos and kisses. A woman spurned…
Well if you did fancy them thats just stupid on your part to let them go like that. What you do is you say you are very busy without extra explanation (women love that actually) and you get they’re contact info / schedule them for later.
These guys who get caught up in the #metoo movement don’t read the signals correctly. They focus on having to have a particular girl and when she doesn’t return the desire they force it. Desperate, lazy, usually punching way above their weight, looks wise, and picking low hanging fruit.  I’m about as touchy as you can get on a first date. I start light touching pretty much as soon as I see them. Go in for the first kiss within the first hour. I have never had a woman complain or turn me down for a 2nd date. Honestly a lot of women will attack you before you even have to worry about it if you’re doing things right.
You’ve hit the nail on the head. I never worry about Metoo or feminism in general when dating women.
Not dating at work, or in my case since I’m a freelancer, at the clients office really, really helps with this. Your ‘don’t date at work’ article in 2011 helped me see the light with that. A couple of years back I had a cute blonde as a co-worker, who was always very flirty with me. I remained friendly but never acted on it. Lucky me, because she moved on to another co-worker. And they gave each other chlamydia.
How do I know? Well, she unashamedely told me and a couple of other colleagues when we were working late one night. Yikes! Really dodged a bullet there.
Because I don’t put myself in that situation anymore I don’t worry about Metoo.
Most women I meet aren’t that preoccupied with Metoo and feminism either. On the contrary, many women actually dislike current feminism. If you act with confidence and a sense of style in your dating life, the Alpha 2.0 way, you’ll be fine.
And yes, there are many Feminism related horrorstories out there about men getting royally screwed in divorces or trouble at work. But if you read/watch these carefully (read between the lines) most of these stories could have been avoided if the men didn’t put themselves in these positions. So ignore them or see them as a form of entertainment/ cautionary tales.
By the way, one of the biggest MeToo scandals in my country (the Netherlands) was with a gay casting director. Apparently up and coming male actors, both gay and heterosexual, had to do some extracurricular activities to get a part. And since his casting agency was the largest this meant he had a lot of victims. A (locally) famous TV-presenter had denied his advances in his younger years, but was sent a ‘cease and desist’ letter by the lawyers of this casting director for talking about this incident. The Tv-presenter tore that letter to pieces on live television and told them to fuck off. Makes for funny viewing.
Anyhooo, showbusiness is quite different in that regard compared to normal corporate life. If you’re dealing with a creepy dude working in some marketing department, you can always find a job in marketing at another company. If however you want to become a star, but in order to do that you have to deal with some creepy casting director or handsy producer you’re screwed. Because there aren’t that many alternatives.
Actually Caleb there is one group you left out who does need to worry about the #MeToo movement.
College Students attending Universities, living on Campus, Fraternities, ETC. Rape on Campuses is a big topic these days too. They are making examples left and right of people due to a a few bad apple. They make college campuses situations sound very blown out proportion like a war zone with mass rapes going on!
This is where Alan Roger Curries way of doing things is really good. If you verbalize your intent that directly, it will be very hard to say later that someone didn’t give consent.
I would expand the “date women at work” to anyone working in mid to large sized companies. I’ve had it happen to me when an angry boyfriend saw a text I sent a girl I had only gone on a first date with flipped out and started contacting people I used to work with. If I hadn’t been fully Alpha 2.0 transitioned it would have been a real problem.
I also know a VP who got fired for a ruckus a non-work girl he was dating stirred up. And a few other instances I was less close to that seemed like that type of situation that ended in serious negative consequences for the guy.
I think in general people have realized income sources and communities / groups you’re apart of are a great point of leverage when trying to get what they want from you. The more perceived money/power/status you have the more sophisticated and effortful the potential attacks. I agree it’s still a small risk even for the above average man but as we move further left I believe you need to be prepared if only for peace of mind when someone starts stirring up your life a bit.
All the more reason to be Alpha 2.0 in the first place.
Like criminals most feminists mark themselves for easy recognition. Look for the green or blue hair. That’s how you recognize them. Lke a rattlesnake rattling its tale.
I said this jokingly but sad because it’s true.
CW commenter above is right.
Of all places, the workplace is where it’s at.
Not if you’re a low-level office worker, but if you have seniority, rank, or title. VP, Director, Manager, that sort of thing. They know they can get money out of you (which is the whole shenanigan behind it).
Secondly to position and power, you must have pursued a woman <b>who was under your command /employ or supervision</b>. If you meet those two elements in the workplace, you have position and she is below your rank, you can be a prey to those women. It’s not just #MeToo bullshit, it’s the sexual harassment laws. She quits because she’s tired of the job (or is incompetent), and then hits you and the company you worked for with a sexual harassment suit).
Most of these user comments are cringeworthy.
The “MeToo” bullshit is what happens when a bunch of no game rich guys start sexually harassing women for sex because they can’t get laid otherwise.  If you aren’t a creep this will literally never happen to you.
HOWEVER
Its completely possible to have trouble with women getting the police involved, or destroying your reputation (especially if they are in your social circle).
All the nonsense I’ve had with women that reached this level of nonsense (and I’ve had a fair share) involved a combination of 1) being monogamous and 2) another guy being involved and 3) me getting blamed to cover up their bad behavior.
I was not smart previous to my divorce.  I saw the same thing happen to scores of men and didn’t develop the skills to handle it when it happened to me because I figured I was special. I assure you that you aren’t special either.
Learning how to get scarce immediately or sooner after you get dumped in a mono relationship will go a long way to limiting the damage.
Or, just follow BDs plan and don’t get mono in the first place.
thanks. I’ve had two scares and both times there was alchohol involved so I was advised and stopped partaking in alchohol related social events and problem solved.
will keep this in mind moving forward. gotta keep this in mind since some of the channels i like end up talking about this a lot even though it doesn’t relate to me atm.
winning through intimidation at its core!
onward to the friendly and hot super babes
Only problem I’ve ever had is FWB’s that are in different companies but the same industry (real estate)
Smaller town so we end up having transactions together.
1) I can’t legally steer my clients away from transactions she is involved in
2) I’m required by law to disclose that I am in a “casual romantic relationship” with the other agent (she must disclose it as well)
Clients don’t give a shit, but twice now with women it raised huge ASD and they dumped me.
I’m not one to stress out about metoo or any of that crap….but maybe there’s more risk there than I realize?
Well if the law says you have to disclose romantic relationship then you dont disclose FWB because they by definition are not romantic nor causal romantic. The romantic part is absent altogether, thats the whole point of a FWB. It’s a friend. Do you have to according to the law disclose you are friends with someone? I don’t think so and if yes how do they define when its a friend or an acquintance? Do you have to disclose acquintances? It’s a friend you sometimes have sex with, but what you do with a friend or don’t do is not anyones business. The key emphasis is here that it’s a friend. I’d say keep that in mind and stop disclosing it.
Nope. Required by state law to disclose a sexual relationship due to agency laws stating that the sexual relationship can jeopardize the public by breaching the fiduciary responsibility of the agents to not illegally disclose detrimental financial information. (Yes, confirmed by my attorney) Failure to disclose could cost me my license, jail time, and lawsuits.
“Casual romantic relationship” is wording required by my state’s real estate commission for the disclosure. Theoretically it also puts me in “limited agency” the same as if I personally was working both sides of the deal…but I thus far have avoided that.
Realtors all fuck around with each other, and my state takes it very seriously after a big lawsuit a few years back.
Price of doing business, bro.
This is both my view and my experience. The actual percentage of women in the real world who actually give a shit about feminism in any way whatsoever, even in very left-wing cities, is very, very tiny. The number of actual, hardcore feminists is even smaller.
College is an entirely different situation and has nothing to do with #MeToo but rather the strange, insular, alien world in which colleges exist. College guys just need to to the five things I listed here and they’ll never have a problem.
I wouldn’t. That’s ridiculous.
That has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with #MeToo.
About 8 or 9 years ago a beta male orbiter jealous of an 18 year-old MLTR I had at the time went to my main business website and emailed a bunch of random people on the “businesses I’ve worked with page” I had back then, telling them all that I was a sexual predator and linked to a blog page he wrote about it, with my picture and hers. Only two of his emails he sent actually got to any human beings, both of whom thought it was some kind of hack or spam, just laughed and deleted it, and didn’t give a shit.
That kind of silly crap happens all the time. Nothing to do with #MeToo.
Yes. The problems you’re talking about are part of the risks of being an employee, not of #MeToo.
No, he’s not, as I just showed above.
Correct. Exactly why you shouldn’t ever attempt to fuck any women you work with. It’s just dumb, and frankly, I’m at the point where I feel that men who are still dumb enough or desperate enough to do this kinda get what they deserve. It’s similar to how I feel about men who get traditionally married these days and then are shocked when they get financially get raped in a divorce and lose their kids. You’re shocked… why?
I don’t have any sympathy for morons anymore.
Because “this chick is different”
frankly, that’s always why.  But you know that.  Clearly they don’t.
BD …bet the times you talked to women while on a date about #metoo is zero
would you please do a movie review on the Jesse Eisenberg “comedy” , self defense ..a movie about toxic masculinity?
…Movies these days ..
I personally know 2 guys that were arrested based on false rape accusations in the last 2 years. Neither of them was charged with anything because accusations were bs and those chicks fucked them willingly but in both cases police showed up at their homes and taken them away in handcuffs.  In both cases it was by chicks they met on tinder.
To knowingly and purposefully make false crime accusation is a class A felony. Those chicks are looking at a very long jail time, though I am not sure if its automatic or only if he would press charges which he should and make an example out of them, that’s what I’d do.
Also I am not sure if the police is allowed to take you away in handcuffs based on accusation alone otherwise people would accuse each other of some random stuff left and right and police would always be taking people in handcuffs by default. Therefore if this happened to me I would also sue the hell out of the police and push for a huge sum of money.
Maybe there is a reason why stuff like this happens only in the US, because the average american just became so beta he doesn’t do anything back and that is why they do it and get away with this. In most other countries the women would get crucified for false accusations if it turned out to be false, not just by the justice system but also by the public.
That’s not something I worry about at all in my country. For two reasons:
the ‘believe all women’ movement never was really big here.
The police is heavily underfunded and doesn’t have the manpower to do serious detective work whenever there’s rape case. This actually quite serious, the number of real rapists being prosecuted has gone down because of it. According to one recent study about 1200 sex offender are walking free, who should be behind bars. And this in a country of 17 million inhabitants.
Im as touchy as you can get on a date (date only).  Never had anyone complain.  I usually end up getting molested myself by women if I don’t progress things quick enough.  If a woman isn’t open to having her personal space invaded it’s insanely easy to read.  Guys who are at danger either don’t care to read the signals or inexperienced.
True as f. If she doesn’t like it she will withdraw and look annoyed or leave. Also in my experience being touchy on a date is pretty much required.
Most places making a false accusation isn’t nearly as big of a deal as it should. It’s often just something like filing a false police report (which is about the equivalent of a speeding ticket).
And yes police can detain you for being accused of a crime.
Correct. That’s why I get laid a lot. Controversial topics like #MeToo are not to be discussed with a woman before you’ve had sex with her at least twice.
Maybe; I’ve considered it.
And I’d bet $10,000 of my own money that A) there was more to the story than you’re saying and/or B) they violated one or more of the five things I listed here.
That doesn’t necessarily justify what happened of course, but as I said above, it’s incumbent upon men to be aware of the environment in which they now live and stop being surprised at this shit.
Haha. I’ve had that “quality problem” myself a few times. One minute you’re chillin’, talking to a woman on a second date and the next minute shes grabbing your cock. 🙂
I’m acquainted with someone who was a District Attorney around the time when OJ Simpson was acquitted.  And a number of other attorneys.
Before OJ, police officers showed a lot of discretion on what domestic violence charges they pressed and what they let slide. Â However, the negative press from the trial drove them to change how they operated because of potential liability issues for the department.
After that, if the cops showed up for any reason, as practice, they were going to arrest someone and it probably was gonna be the man. Zero tolerance.  No evidence necessary.  This was annoying to the attorneys because a lot of these cases were nonsense but because they didn’t want to get skewered as weak on crime the next election, they were obligated to prosecute them.  This is not reciprocated when it’s woman on male domestic violence a lot of the time.  Police are managing optics and department liability, and that’s it.
A lot of that still carries over now. Â Do not ever get physical with someone who you are sleeping with, and if she does it to you, get yourself scarce.
She can accuse you of all kinds of things after you are gone and the cops show up, but if you aren’t there and there are no injuries to her, you’ll probably be fine.
There is an article in the Atlantic last week on how the charges against Senator Franken were bullshit.  I’d link it but I don’t wanna trip the spam filter.  Point being unless you wanna become an incel, tighten your game up.
The only thing I can really interpret from the #MeToo thing is that chicks DO want sex, they just want it on THEIR terms, or at least on terms where they do not feel overly pressured or overly threatened.
And in the case of male public figures, yeah. They realize that they have a lot to gain. But that’s just them playing the game. Look, if I could get lots of money or recognition by accusing a really famous woman of doing sexual stuff with me against my will, I might consider it if I didn’t have any values or principles (which most people are completely devoid of, let alone accusers, who often act like the criminals they want behind bars).
Most of the chicks who scream about this stuff also have higher sex drives. About 2 years ago, I got with a VYW chick who would post #MeToo related stuff on social media. She gave me oral sex (and swallowed) on our second date. She asked if she could do it, I was like “do you feel comfortable with it?” and she excitedly said “I like it!” before the act.
This was after we cuddled and chatted in my bed about random stuff for about 20 minutes or so. Guess she was just really comfortable with going from that to fooling around.
A lot of chicks who rage about this just want to feel safer when having sex and because social media activism spikes pretty much all of the brain’s happy chemicals, they tend to express themselves by threatening dudes on the internet with the law.
They’re also on a full scale campaign against PUA cringe. Flashy stuff, telling chicks to smile and shit, “neg hits,” and not having self awareness about all this will soon get punished very harshly.
And I don’t really blame them. If I was getting hit on by chicks I wasn’t sure about who said really cringy nonsense to me that I could see right through and who pressured me so much before sex to where it was a major form of stress for me, I’d be doing similar stuff.
It’s the #MeToo movement’s obsession with justice (which to me is just retained vengeance) against anyone with a cock n balls and lack of awareness that boys and men can get sexually assaulted just as much as any woman that concerns me.
Men who get sexually assaulted still have next to NO voice, and we’re still dealing with SP presented by both sexes that says “men don’t get sexually assaulted” or “sexual assault doesn’t affect men like it does women.” Meanwhile I’m sitting here saying “yo, that’s happened to me TWICE, god dammit!” It’s frustrating to deal with.
This pretty much. And even with inexperience, a lot of inexperienced dudes don’t really have anything to fear either since they are nervous when they flirt or escalate.
Its the dudes who get told to “be dominant” who will struggle the most. And for good reason, most of those types are asshole alpha 1s who are really annoying and who are often more emotionally sensitive than the chicks they’re trying to get with.
I concur that most people lack solid principles, but not in a way criminals lack those. It’s just that most people are very susceptible to peer pressure. If a girl tells her friends she had sex with a celebrity and was disappointed, is “That happens. Shrug and move on” going to be the majority opinion?
Ive become extremely introverted at work or with clients since metoo. Â No flirts, jokes, or any dark humor anymore. Â Maybe its too strict but it goes along with my previous policy of not doing business with friends or family, or becoming too close with business contacts. Â Somebody always gets butthurt and then you lose money
Went on a couple “dates” with a hardcore feminist this week. First date we had a quick drink at a bar then went to my house and had sex. Second date she came over, hung out and we had sex again.
This is a self proclaimed feminist. She says she “hates white men”, and has her masters degree in some sort of social study. Aside from all of her contradictory bullshit she was fun to be around and good in bed (plus she was fuckin hot). I’m sure she’ll stick around for a while.
This has been my experience with feminists. My kinkiest MLTR was a feminist from Berkeley and we did all kinds of crazy stuff. She was a lovely person.
Just because you disagree with someone doesn’t mean you can’t have a good relationship with them. Though they probably shouldn’t be an OLTR…
Agree. Just keep them as FBs or low-end MLTRs.
I’ve had FB relationships with hardcore socialists, hardcore Christians, and serious, hardcore Dominants, and they were all perfectly fine, particularly when they had beta boyfriends they could scream at.
It’s like I said: These types are psychotically horny, they just want sex on their terms. In some cases, they want to be the ones who are forcing themselves on men in the name of Girl Power lol. That’s literally it. That’s all the #MeToo thing means. I just want women’s groups to begin operating from an angle of understanding and awareness instead of vengeance. But seeing as collectivism has become such a religion that we’re beginning to think only in terms of activism, I doubt that will happen.
If the Girl Power crew REALLY didn’t enjoy sex (and they do exist), they’d come up with something like #SexIsIllegal or something lol.
But fortunately, sex-negativity is getting more and more rare at least from what I’m seeing. The only thing the #MeToo thing has shown me is that going into the 2020s, it will FINALLY stop being “taboo” to talk about sex. When that happens, the sexes will enjoy less misunderstandings about sex, and we’ll finally be able to single out those who use sex as a means to power.
At least I hope that’s what will happen. But it probably won’t. We’ll probably just see more retarded, toxic, activism based in vengeance.
Hi Caleb, please use google translator since i think this new is not in english. Long story short. 5 guys in Pamplona (Spain) had group sex with a girl in San Fermines (mont wild spanish feast, read Hemingway). They record it with the cell phone, and at the end, they stole her phone (guess that was a super stupid joke). The girls had regrets, claimed raped, guys already jailed for 15 years.
Note Spain has Stalin like gender laws.
https://es.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caso_de_La_Manada
So we should be careful.
I have to say reading the comments of many of you, you guys are total pussies and well this is exactly the reason why we have the stuff we have with the horror stories happening and the metoo nonsense – because of guys like you.
Because women know they can get away with it. Do you think this stuff would be happening if the guy just laughed and ignored it and if she did try to take him to court he would wipe the floor with her and make sure she ends up in jail? (False crime accusation is among the highest level of felonies.)
No. Once again, nothing you’re describing has anything to do with #MeToo, and you’re talking about some seriously stupid men who committed a crime (they stole her phone).
For fuck sake, don’t take these wild and extreme horror stories of guys being extremely reckless and stupid and point at them in terror worrying that the exact same thing is going to happen to you. That’s stupid.
I’m beginning to agree.
“ZOMG chicks are accusing ALL THE DUDEZ of teh RapeZ!”
Yeah. Five dudes having sex with ONE chick and filming it with HER phone is TOTALLY legit. Happens all the time. Nothing criminal about this at all.
I’m not sure why.
At a minimum, if you don’t mess around with women you work with (and you’ve written extensively on this) you eliminate the potential for actual MeToo claims.
The rest of the sprawling and expansive claims of harassment that aren’t MeToo but proport to be MeToo (which is what everyone seems to be writing about) are nixed if you don’t act like a creep, or get monogamous with them.
If one avoids women who work in the same company, isn’t a creep, and doesn’t get monogamous, MeToo and it’s related problems won’t happen to you.
This is is true, especially if you are in a mono relationship.
The criteria to file a temporary restraining order against a romantic partner in California is “I feel threatened” and then pay the process server to deliver papers.  That RO becomes permanent if you don’t dispute it, and your attorney doesn’t work for free.
It happened to me during divorce proceedings when my ex was trying to get leverage.  I had zero contact with her for two years and moved a couple of hundred miles away, and that didn’t stop her.
My divorce attorney told me this was fairly common during divorce proceedings these days if your ex is vindictive, crazy, or desperate.
Maybe where you are, but stateside this is literally never charged.
Don’t get married with them and this isn’t a problem.  If you do marry them and are surprised when it happens, I can’t say I didn’t warn you.
I’m beginning to agree that a hell of a lot of men are being needlessly terrified pussies about this.
Correct. That’s my point.
@joelsuf
Actually, all the feminists I’ve been with were submissives sexually. Most of them are dominant in other aspects of their lives though.
I like when I have this problem too.
Sometimes, because I fucked too much the day prior with other women, I take things slowly and last time I did that with a woman, she was all over me french kissing, groping and grinding and asking anxiously “are you going to fuck me?” and then she said “I need to feel your cock in my ass” and proceeded to various things she knows turn me on, including deep throating my cock.
I agree completely that #metoo is not relevant to 95% of men. But this:
Pretty sure a month or two ago, you said “women don’t escalate, you gonna have to do it yourself.” Which I also agreed with.
Of course, women will happily grab your cock if they have had it up them before, but not generally before then.
The scenario I described is something called… wait for it… the “exception to rule.”
The problem is, IMO, for guys who get mono, are with someone a couple of months to a couple of years, another guy gets mixed up with their gal, and then the cops get involved because just what happens.
If you want to blame me for marrying her, fine. I accept that I lit the fuse on that bomb 20 years ago and deserved it going off. But a lot of guys are stuck in mono relationships, and aren’t ready for it, and are unaware it’s ticking away.
They literally think they are doing everything right and are destroyed when things detonate. Rollo’s blog is (or was, haven’t read it in several years) full of stunned soon to be or being or recently divorced married guys. They start extrapolating it into #metoo which was behavior that was actually creepy but women didn’t have the upper hand. It’s wrong but I think we all grew up with a certain respect for police and the system to not roll over and screw you. You thought you were doing the right thing. You were a decent husband and you never hit or threatened anyone.
Next thing you know the cops are at your door because she’s drunk and screaming at 2am after being out with Sancho and lost her keys and you’re getting served with a RO at work two days later. Or you see someone have it happen, but bullshit yourself “nah, that’ll never happen to me”.
Can you really blame guys for being confused? Just sorting out a concept like social programming is hard enough, most responses here just show the same mixed up confusion.
Most people are lazy, they do not want to do the step(s) and get what they wanted. Excuses are buffers! Most men are in dilemma and a lil consecutive rejections crushing their souls.
i am in showbiz (not holywood different continent…kinda left wingi…) and so had some small rep”scares” recentlyÂ
you say not to worry unless “Are you very wealthy, powerful, and/or famous? ” so what if i kinda am/going there? any tips?
also, saying to stay professional and not flirt/hookup with coworkers…that might be smart but kinda bummer as it’s part of the fun of freelancing in the arts…we’r in it for the babes, also some babes can get you work and are actually potential clients in this cases maybe hooking up can be beneficial…?
p.s when in a smaller hollywood type industry city, everyone is a potential coworker/rising star/feminist/bitter loser looking for revenge fame….
this is stressing me on dates trying to always think about verbal consent and fear of being sexual…taking all this to account i am starting to rethink monogamy just as it seems much more safe this days than being seem as a single playboy hook….i just really am afraid the more succes and fame i’l get the more chances of ending like loui c k weinshtein etc just by “playing the feild”…