6 Techniques To Improve Your Online Dating Photos


Today I’m going to give you six things you can do to improve the way your face looks in photos, as well as things like video calls, when you’re initiating online dating. These things are very simple, and they’ll dramatically improve the way you look when you participate in these things.

As I’ve said many times before, 80% of your success in your online dating endeavors depends on the quality of your photos. Everything else you can do, correctly or incorrectly, amounts to the other 20%. So the quality of your photos is awfully important. Moreover, those of you who are dating much younger women or women in COVID-lockdown areas right now may have to have a video call (or two) to make women comfortable enough to meet with you in real life. These techniques also work with those as well.

1.  Fake tanning wipes

If you’re a more pale guy like me, you should fake tan the day before you have your photos taken or you participate in any video calls. There are several ways to do this: lotions, sprays, foams, and the like. But the best that I have found is called L’Oreal Sublime Bronze Self-Tanning towelettes. You can get them on Amazon.

You tear one open and wipe it over your face; it’s like a big wet wipe. Wipe down your neck (and the back of it), and you can wipe down your hands and arms if you want to. Do this right before you go to bed, and when you wake up, you will be a lot less white. Your skin will look a lot less bad in photos and video calls. Anything I’m doing where I need to look less bad, I wipe down with one of these the night before and it gives me a little more color than I had.

The bad thing about these is that they only last three or four days, so eventually, this stuff washes off. But do this the night before, and they’re very helpful. They’re idiot-proof.

2.  Lighting

This is something a lot of guys don’t know much about, including me. I’ve been forced to get a little better at this since I started doing YouTube videos. But I can tell you from experience that men don’t know shit about how to place lighting for photos or videos.

Even in my temporary Airbnb in Dubai, I have set up a front-facing light and a side light for my YouTube videos that help tremendously. There have been studies and surveys done, including one by OkCupid, that reveal better-lit photos get much higher match rates and response rates. Worst-case scenario, go online and buy yourself a ring light or two. They’re cheap and available on Amazon, and you can place them the same way I did. 

But address your lighting. Make sure you’re not just using the ambient light in the room or from the window. These are usually not sufficient. Also be aware that outdoor lighting is usually too much. If it’s really sunny out, it’s a bad idea to have pictures taken. You have to be aware of the lighting in your photos and videos and find an effective medium. I’ve done it, so I know you can too.

3.  The angle of the camera

We learned back in our Myspace days that if you hold the camera slightly above your head and look upward at it, your face looks a little more trim. Your jawline looks better, and double chins are less prominent.

Always be aware of the angle of the camera. The chubbier you are or the rounder your face is, the more important this is.

Whenever I go to the photographer to get new photos taken, I always have the guy hold the camera slightly above my eye level for this very reason. It has a slight downward angle and it makes me look a lot better (or at least less bad).

4.  Use makeup (if necessary)

Wait, makeup? What the fuck? I’m not a girl!

Some of you guys are going to need a little makeup on certain areas of your face to touch up certain problems. Some of you who have big, rosy red cheeks will need to get some of that green makeup that’s designed for that; it minimizes red cheeks and you’ll look a lot better.

I used to have to put a little makeup powder in my eyebrows because mine are naturally sparse. This helped them look a lot more normal.

If you have acne or things like that, you’ll need to get some concealer to cover that up. Concealer—that’s what it’s called, and it’s pretty common. If you’re going to use concealer, make sure you get one that’s color-matched to your skin so it looks as natural as possible. If necessary, have a woman at the makeup counter or a woman you trust help you with this.

5.  Maintain facial hair

I’ve mentioned this before in my books and blogs. We’ve done some empirical and anecdotal testing in the past, and it’s clear that most women—more than 50%—like facial hair, and your results, generally speaking, will tend to be better if you have some.

The problem is that a lot of guys let their facial hair grow out willy nilly and look all hipstered-out. It looks gross and scruffy and unkempt. You’ve got to clean this up. Make it look tight and good. Clean facial hair will outperform shitty facial hair every time. Yes, there are exceptions. But if you have facial hair, clean that shit up!

6.  Getting your hair done

The easiest way to do this for most guys is to, one time, go to a fancy salon that appeals to men. Get a cool haircut, then take a bunch of pictures of it from all angles. The next time you need it done, go to the cheap SuperCuts place and have them duplicate it as best they can. That’s the least bad way of doing this unless you’re a metrosexual guy and you’re good at doing things like this, which is fine too.

Those six things will help you in your online dating efforts. Know them and do them!

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