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As the West continues to collapse and as more men adopt a location-independent or international lifestyle I’ve been getting asked a certain question much more today than ever before. It’s this:

“How do I maintain FBs, MLTRs, or other types of relationships with women in other cities or countries when I’ll be gone for several weeks or months?”

I used to get that question a few times a year.  Now it seems like I get it multiple times a month. The fact I’m getting this question so much more often is music to my ears. It means more and more of you are getting off your asses and developing location-independent, five flags Alpha Male 2.0 lifestyles. Good!

In this article, I will assist you with maintaining multiple women in different places worldwide. I’ve been maintaining long-term, long-distance FBs for well over ten years now. At first, these women were in various cities throughout the USA when I lived there. Today, living a five flags lifestyle, I have active FBs in no less than eight different countries, from the UK to the USA and from Paraguay to Kazakhstan. All of these women I’ve been seeing for at least three years, some of them as long as ten years. Some are sugar daddy women and others are normal FBs.

First, as always, we need to get our definitions straight. As most of you know, we have three types of relationships at Alpha Male 2.0:

FB – A friend with benefits; a woman you have sex with but you are not dating and are not attracted to her emotionally; you’re just friends who have sex and that’s it.

MLTR – A woman you’re dating (going on dates, etc) and you are emotionally attracted to her. It’s a real relationship. However, it’s not exclusive in any way so you can date other women (i.e. have multiple MLTRs) and she can even date other men if she wants.

OLTR – Your non-mono girlfriend (if you don’t live with her) or wife (if you live with her; this is called an OLTR wife). You can have sex with other women whenever you want but you can’t date other women, thus if you have an OLTR you can have as many FBs on the side as you like but you can’t have any MLTRs.

When I say “long-distance relationship” I mean a relationship where the woman lives so far away that you must get on a plane to see her (or her you). If she, for example, lives three hours away by car or train, I don’t consider that a long-distance relationship; that’s just a local woman who lives three hours away; you could easily see her every week with a little planning. So long-distance means she lives in another country or extremely far away within your current country (only if you live in a geographically large country like Canada or the USA). So when I lived in Portland, Oregon, women who lived in Seattle four hours away were not “long-distance” but women who lived in Florida certainly were.

With all that out of the way, here is how you maintain long-distance relationships for the long term.

1. Don’t do long-distance MLTRs. Long-distance relationships that actually work are the realm of FBs and sometimes OLTRs. Long-distance MLTRs rarely work and you shouldn’t even attempt them. The reason is that she’ll find some other guy while you’re gone. Why should she bother to date you when you’ve committed nothing to her and when she can easily go date some other guy in her city who doesn’t leave her for weeks or months at a time?

The reason this works with FBs is that she can date other guys while you’re gone but still see you again as an FB later. If instead you’re an MLTR, she’s not going to keep a full-on dating relationship with you while she has another dating relationship with a local guy.

The reason this can work with OLTRs or OLTR wives (if you’re careful and it’s temporary) is that there are numerous financial, logistical, and relationship commitments that you’ve made to her (unlike an MLTR to whom you’ve made no commitments) that maintain even while you’re gone, even if you’re gone for weeks or months. She also knows you’ll be back together soon (whereas with an MLTR she has no idea, and even if you’ve told her she has no idea if you’re telling the truth because there is no commitment from you).

As I write these words, I’m long-distance from my OLTR wife for the second time. We are still married and together, and all of my commitments to her hold. We also talk on the phone every day, seven days a week. She knows I’m not just going to take off or never see her again. She also knows this is temporary just like the last time we did this and not the forever status quo.

So when it comes to long-distance relationships: FBs, yes; MLTRs, no; OLTRs, yes but only if you have to for temporary periods.

I have rarely seen any long-distance MLTRs work for long periods (it’s just too hard) but I’ve seen many long-term FBs and OLTRs (temporary) work just fine in a long-distance capacity.

2. Always maintain regular contact during the entire time you’re absent from her. With FBs, you should minimally have text conversations once every few weeks. Talk about basic stuff like how her life is going, what she’s doing, what you’re doing, when you’ll be back, and how you’re excited to see her again. These do not need to be long, drawn-out conversations (though they can be and they’re allowed). An occasional phone call or video call is also perfectly okay and perhaps even a good idea for special FBs you want to keep for a very long time.

For OLTRs, you should be on the phone or video call (not texts) several times a week, every day if that’s what she needs (every woman is different). These calls should be important, special events for her. Let her do most of the talking (as usual) and tell her you love her and you miss her. Try to surprise her with romantic little texts when she’s not expecting it. If you’re gone during any special occasions, like her birthday or whatever, send her gifts and/or have flowers sent to her. Just keep the relationship going as if you were there as best as you can.

Also, the expectation for long-distance OLTRs or OLTR wives is that this is only a temporary situation and that you’ll be back together in a “normal” relationship soon.

3. Always keep her in the loop about when you’re coming back to her city. If you know the exact date or even just the exact month of your return, tell her this when you’re together in person so she can expect and plan on this. Yes, it’s possible she may not believe you but do it anyway and be sincere.

Keep reminding her of this when you communicate. “Just two more months now and I’ll be back!”

As soon as you get the exact date of your arrival, text her and let her know when you’re arriving and how long you’re staying (if you have a departure date).

The point is to treat her like a real partner regarding your travel plans regarding when you’ll be back in her location again. Make her part of the process. It builds and maintains investment on her part.

4. Encourage her to visit your city. The odds of success on this are low since usually FBs, particularly those in emerging market countries won’t have a lot of money to spend on plane tickets, but sometimes you’ll be surprised and she will visit your city or a nearby city where you can possibly meet her. Don’t push this with women, but always keep that option open.

5. If you have no interest in ever doing sugar daddy game, or if you are too young or too poor at the moment to do it then feel free to skip this one, but sugar daddy game does statistically increase the longevity of long-distance FBs. If she knows she’s going to get a little money when she sees you again her long-term retention goes way up, for obvious reasons. This is even if she gets a boyfriend while you’re gone; she’ll probably still see you (as usual, monogamy doesn’t work).

The good news is if she lives in a lower-end country she won’t need very much money to keep her interested. The bad news is that if she lives in a Western or first-world country she’ll expect more. As usual with sugar daddy game, only do things that are easily within your budget, and don’t be a needy bitch about this. Don’t be sending thousands of dollars to random women all over the planet; that’s extreme pussy beta male shit.

You still need to do everything else in this article to maintain her though. Just because you’re giving her a little money when you see her doesn’t mean you can completely ignore her for six months while you’re gone. Also, to be clear, don’t give her any money while you’re gone, even if she asks (and some women will). You’re not her boyfriend. Just keep it to money when you see her in person.

Sugar daddy game is a big topic for another time, and it’s certainly not required (I’ve maintained years-long long-distance FBs without giving them a penny), but just realize that it does help long-distance maintenance.

6. Be super nice to her when you see her in person, following all Alpha Male 2.0 relationship standards and Cardinal Rules. Don’t ever give her drama, don’t tell her what to do, let her talk a lot, make her orgasm every time you have sex, and so on. If you’re just the average guy and average lay to her, she won’t stick around, even if you’re doing sugar daddy game.

You want her to truly miss you while you’re gone. You want her to be excited to see you again. I’ve had some long-distance FBs beg me to father children with them. At least two of them have straight up asked me to marry them. Others will text me out of the blue telling me they miss me. If you want these long-distance women you only see a few times a year to stick around, this is the kind of thing you want.

If there are more details you want on maintaining long-term long-distance relationships, I can certainly write more articles about this; just let me know.

Question of the Week: Long-Distance Relationship With A Near-Virgin

To have your question featured here where I will write an entire article addressing it, click here. You will always remain anonymous.

P.W. Writes:

I’m currently in a long-distance relationship with a woman from Sweden; I’m based in Canada. We’ve reached a critical point where I need to decide our future. I’ve done modeling work in the past; she’s cute but not hot. She’s contemplating leaving her life in Sweden and is willing to self-fund her move to Canada to live with me for a year, aiming for a more conventional relationship.

I genuinely love her, but I’m conflicted. She’s from a traditional family and I took her virginity so she’s only been with one guy and here I am, a guy who’s been quite active in the dating scene. If we broke up, I’d be sad but I would get over it and I believe she would eventually be okay too. I’m deciding whether to let her move to Canada or end things now. Is there a real chance for a long-term future, or would it be unfair to let her commit a year to someone so far away under these circumstances?

This is one of those questions I get where you already know the answer to the question, and you already know exactly what I’m going to say. You just need someone else, a third party like me, to scream the answer at you that you know is coming, to somehow give you “permission” to do what you know you should do.

So okay, here it goes.

Of course you’re not going to let her move in with you. You’re acting like a moron and you need to snap out of it.

You know damn well that you would be miserable living with this woman like husband and wife for an entire year (or more) under a monogamous relationship, which you know she’d demand (being a near-virgin from a traditional family). You would either cheat on her and get caught, or you’d go crazy well before the year was up and end it, or you’d suffer through a year of hell until you could finally breathe a sigh of relief when she finally left. In all three scenarios, you lose.

You’re just being too nice because you have feelings for her. But I have a feeling out of the tons of women who currently live in your city you can find one or two who are just as good or better than her.

What you could do, if you really want to, is tell her something like this: “You can move here on your own dime but you’d have to get your own place for a while; you can’t stay with me. Then we could date and see where things went, and if we end up getting serious then we’ll take that step down the road. But while we’re dating I’m going to have sex with other girls a lot, as in every week. I’ll be careful and wear condoms but if you complain about that even one time I’m going to end the relationship and you’ll be in a strange country on your own. If you’re willing to take that risk, then sure, come on over. If not, you’d better stay in Sweden, and I’ll miss you, but you should find a guy there more compatible with your long-term desires.”

Then the ball’s in her court and if she decides to do it (she won’t) then the responsibility is on her.

This, gentlemen, is why it’s so dangerous to catch feelings for a long-distance woman. Keep them as FBs only, and you’ll never have this problem.