Merry Christmas everyone! Let’s talk about the Fast and the Furious movies! Wait, what? Uh… there isn’t even one out this year. Looks like BD’s had too much eggnog. What in the floppy hell does Fast and the Furious have to do with anything?
A lot. I’ll show you. Now shut up and listen.
These Fast and Furious movies make over a billion dollars every time one is released, at least lately. Why is this? There are a few reasons, but the primary one is the folks behind these movies have carefully crafted this series of silly, fun, stupid, action porn movies in specific ways to sell lots of movie tickets.

-By Caleb Jones

One of the clever things they’ve done is to make the series appeal not just to men, but to women as well. Women fuckin’ love these Fast and Furious movies, very unlike any other normal action franchise you can think of. If just guys liked these movies, I promise you they wouldn’t make a billion dollars. A hell of a lot of women see these movies and enjoy them.
Do you know why they enjoy them?
I do. Here’s just one example.
A few years ago, I took a MLTR to one of these movies, and as she walked out of the theater, she had a horny, excited look in her eye. She started talking about how much she liked the movie. When I asked her why, she said, “There were FOUR!”

“Four what?” I asked, not understanding.
“Four hot guys!” she said, “Usually, in these movies you’ll get one hot guy, maybe two. But damn, this movie had FOUR. OMG!”
Ah yes. She was absolutely right. She was, of course, referring to Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Dwayne Johnson, and my main man Tyrese Gibson. These are indeed four handsome bastards, and they’re all crammed into these movies (until Walker sadly passed away).

However, it actually goes beyond that. Whomever is behind the marketing genius of these movies didn’t just throw in four randomly hot guys. Any movie can do that. Instead, the Fast and Furious franchise not only gave women four hot guys, but four guys of completely different attractive male archetypes. This way, while the men in the audience are enjoying the action, combat, comedy, and explosions, if you’re a girl, no matter what your taste in men is, you’ll find at least one of these guys super hot… exactly your “type,” and at least one or two others as at least passable.

Here are the four “hot guy” archetypes the Fast and Furious movies present the women in the audience: Masculine, Alpha, Rebel, Bad Boy (Vin Diesel): This is the thuggish, high-testosterone, tough-looking Alpha Male 1.0 who looks angry and dangerous, with a low, gravelly voice, dresses like a gansta, and always looks like he’s ready to murder someone. This is a very popular male archetype these days, particularly with younger women.

Blonde Haired, Blue Eyed Pretty Boy (Paul Walker): This is the gorgeous, clean-cut, boy next door type with dreamy eyes who just about every woman swoons over (unless they’re really into the Bad Boy). Always the best-looking guy of the group.Huge, Jacked Bodybuilder Guy (Dwayne Johnson): This is the Arnold Schwarzenegger, Hercules-looking motherfucker who looks like he’s not even real. Obviously a lot of women (though not all) get really turned on by this.

Smooth, Suave Black Guy (Tyrese Gibson): Oh yeah, I already talked about this type guy in great detail here. When a black guy shaves his head, dresses really nice, calms way, way down, and is smooth and chill with the ladies, he’s gonna get laid left and right, including and especially with women of other races. Typical black guy stereotypes (“Daym gurl you got DAT AYSSSS!”) scare women and turn women off, but smooth, calm, suave black guys, as I’ve said before, are the only men who have ever out-gamed women from under me.

And that is why women like the Fast and Furious movies, and it’s one of the reasons these movies do so well.
By the way, there is one more Hollywoodish attractive male archetype that the Fast and the Furious movies don’t portray, that we can’t leave out of this conversation:
Classy, Successful, Older Man (James Bond, Richard Gere in A Pretty Woman, etc): This is the older guy (but not too old!) dressed in a nice suit who orders fancy martinis and jet sets around the world. He’s always calm, cool, collected, and extremely confident.
These archetypes work, and have worked for a long time. Combining these archetypes is a path to a goldmine of woman lust. Even the boy bands of the 80’s, 90’s and early 2000’s were set up like this. You know, those gay bands that made women gush for decades, like New Kids on the Block, ‘N SYNC, and Backstreet Boys. Like the Fast and the Furious, these bands were carefully designed by clever marketers to sell as many tickets and records as humanly possible to the target audience (in this case, teenage girls). So, they were almost always configured like this:

The really good looking guy (usually “the leader”)
The buffer / tough guy
The bad boy / rebel
The funny / friendly / silly guy (not a sexually attractive archetype, but women like the guy because he reminds them of all their friend zone orbiters, and we know how much women love friend zone)
The boy next door / shy guy (again, not exactly sexually attractive, but it taps into a woman’s latent provider hunter tendencies; you don’t necessarily want to fuck this guy, but this is the guy you want to marry when you get a little older and want babies).

In the Ultimate Online Dating Manual, I talk a lot about assuming an attractive persona, one that is most congruent to you, and to lean in to that persona, improve it as much as you can, and play it up as much as you can. (When I was getting started in the dating world years ago, my persona was that of “Evil James Bond.”)

The reasons this works is because women are compelled by both Societal Programming and Obsolete Biological Wiring to be attracted to certain attractive types of men, attractive archetypes (many I listed above). The closer you can match one of these (and there are many), the higher your dating results become. As I’ve said before, if Societal Programming fills people’s minds with bullshit, you might as well take advantage of it.

A word of warning about this technique: don’t want to pretend to be a type of man you’re not. You want to pick a persona/archetype that is already very close to your natural personality. For example, I could never be a Pretty Boy, or Cool Surfer Dude, or Alpha Thug. My personality and appearance is no where near these types, and never will be. But Evil James Bond, or Classy Older Man? Oh, no problem dude, that I can do.

So take advantage of Societal Programming from Hollywood; pick a persona or archetype, lean in to it, embrace it, and stick with it. You’ll thank me later.

Merry Christmas.
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