Today’s article is for men over the age of 35. If you are under the age of 35, you’re certainly invited as well; this doesn’t quite apply to you yet, but it will soon.
As I talk about in great detail in the Ultimate Younger Woman Manual, if you’re an older man pursuing younger women, your target market will be the Type Two younger women. These are women who are turned off by men their own age and vastly prefer to date older men, sometimes much older men. If you were curious, Type Ones are women who would never date a much older man and are disgusted at the concept (this is the largest group) and Type Threes will gravitate to men their own age but will happily date an older man as long as he has a decent amount of game and doesn’t come across as a creeper.
The bottom line is that the vast majority of younger women you will date will be Type Twos. They are the easiest to be successful with, by far. (Type Ones are more or less impossible and Type Threes are workable but take more time and effort.)
Here’s the problem with most older guys going after younger women: they try to act like younger men.
This is the exact wrong thing to do. Why? By trying to present yourself as younger, you are murdering the very trait which is most likely to attract your largest target market, the Type Twos.
These guys who lie and make their age eight years younger… no! I don’t think you should lie at all, but if you were to lie, I’d rather you lie and make your age older than make your age younger. Yes, if you did this, you’d actually be more successful with the Type Twos. It’s true you’d probably get more matches/ hits/numbers if you lie and make your age younger (or present yourself younger in other ways) but you won’t actually get to sex with these women since many of these newly “interested” prospects will actually be Type Ones (who you won’t get to sex with no matter what you do) and Type Threes (who you won’t get anywhere with unless you have very strong game, do everything right and really take your time).
Guys don’t understand that Type Twos don’t want younger men, nor do they want older men who act like younger men. They want older men who act like older men. That’s the entire point. That’s what they’re attracted to.
They want the things that make older men different from younger men. This means you should not only not try to act younger, but instead you should play up the qualities that older men have over younger men.
Here are the seven qualities of older men, or at least those qualities that Type Two younger women perceive older men to have that you need to place on full display. They are listed in no particular order.
Confidence
I’ve talked about confidence in great detail, including exactly what it is and how to exude it in The Unchained Man and Get To Sex Fast. Younger women assume, usually correctly, that older men tend to be more confident than younger men. Just the act of appearing older and more mature can often give the illusion that you’re more confident.
Of course, you should actually be more confident too, or at least fake it until you make it (in the case of older men who are out of practice because they’ve been monogamous for so long).
Strength of Personality
Older men are perceived to have stronger personalities, stronger wills and more mental toughness. The more of those traits you can exude when talking to younger women, the more successful you will be.
This kind of strength does not mean you’re an asshole (with one exception I’ll get to in a minute). It is indeed possible to be a very strong, tough, nice, polite guy. A true Alpha Male knows how to exude massive inner strength while being relaxed and smooth without being overbearing or a jerk. This is much easier for older men than it is for younger guys in their twenties.
Motivation and Drive
This is huge and should go without saying. This is also one of the biggest reasons why younger women/older men couples are becoming more common. Younger men in the Millennial and Generation Z categories seem to lack the motivation and drive of prior generations. I realize some of you younger guys will start bitching and defending this but we’ve already had that conversation here and here.
The point here is that since we live in a society where, right or wrong, younger men are perceived to have no motivation and drive, it’s much easier for you as an older guy to demonstrate those very traits and stand apart because of them.
Numerous times over the past 12 years I have been dating much younger women and when I tell them I can’t hang out with them because I’m busy working in my exciting (to me) businesses, their attraction for me skyrockets even though they complain I’m being selfish or an asshole. Read this for more information on exactly how that works.
Success
This is basic SMV stuff and you don’t need me to explain this to you. Obviously if you present yourself as more successful as an older man it will help with the younger women. As I’ve said (and proven) many times before, it’s not mandatory, but it does help.
Focus
This goes hand-in-hand with motivation and drive. Younger women notice that when an older man starts a project that’s important to him, he is more likely to single-mindedly focus on that project in ways many younger men can’t or won’t.
Focus is also a core trait of masculinity and thus attractive to females. It’s much more difficult for women to sit down, put their heads down and TOTALLY FOCUS on ONE THING for a LONG TIME. We men are much, much better at this. It’s how our brains are designed. The more you can show women, particularly younger women you have this ability, the better.
Having Your Shit Together
Again, this is something that is more helpful now than it was 30 years ago when most men of all ages had their shit together, including guys in their early twenties. Today, you have to look well past age 35 to find men who have all of their shit together in life, emotionally, physically, financially, career-wise and so on. That means if you’re over 35 and have your shit together, you’re much more attractive to younger women now than at any other point in modern history. It’s a very nice place to be.
As I’ve discussed at my blogs before, as the West continues to collapse, this age of 35 where men have gotten their shit together is going to rise. Soon, women will have to look for men over age 40. Then 45. All that does is benefit you as an older man… assuming you have your shit together of course. (Which means that if you’re an older man and you don’t have your shit together, you’ve got some catching up to do and you’d better stop fucking around right now and get your ass to work.)
Not Tolerating Any Drama or Crap
The biggest difference between younger men and older men in terms of relationships with women is that younger men will tolerate all kinds of drama, bullshit, arguments, insults and other garbage from women where older men generally will not.
This was certainly true with me as a younger man and it was probably true with you as well. Remember back when you were in your twenties… all those long, drawn-out arguments you had with women you were dating. Do you put up with that shit now? Probably not. Today you probably just kick their little asses out the door.
Not putting up with a younger woman’s crap, this father-like authority to shut shit down with her before things get heated or irrational is yet another one of these attraction factors that you must demonstrate. It’s one of the biggest things that will separate you from the younger men her age.
I suggest you rank yourself on each of these seven items and give yourself a score of 1 to 10. If any are below an 8, you should set a goal to get them to at least an 8, if not higher.
When you do, your results with younger women will improve. They can’t not improve.
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How do you demonstrate focus to new women prior to first sex with them?
I understand that after weeks dating you they will know you and see that trait in you. But I don’t understand how they can see that online or even in the first couple dates before sex happens.
How do you know most women are category 2 types? Being a man dating younger women is common but what I usually see is a 5-7 years age gap. So that means if you are like 40 your woman is most likely in her 30s.
Sandro,
I don’t consider a 5-7 year gap a type 2 woman.
I’m 35 and have dated several 18-22 year olds, some of who pretty aggressively showed interest.
Those were the type 2 women.
I also know several women of that age who wouldn’t give me the time of day. Those are the type 1s.
He said most women are type 1s, but most of the ones an older guy will date are type 2s.
No, I don’t think that’s true at all. Maybe one in five women or less. But if there is a pool of a few thousand eligible women, that’s still a lot of women.
@Daniel+ Incognito, yeah I missread what he wrote.
beast.
Good article for this about to be 38 years old, just out of a 16 year marriage dude.
I’m legitimately a very busy man, I’ve noticed this drives women nuts and they give me some shit over it…then damn near rape me when I do make time for them.
I do all 7 of these things very, very well and it works.
Hardest part is finding time to actually put more women in the rotation haha
Pre-sex it’s just a vibe you exude. Focus is more a relationship management tool than a dating tool.
The rule of thumb is that a woman is considered a “younger woman” if she is 10+ years younger than you. (If it’s pre-sex, then it’s 10+ years younger than the age she assumes you are.)
So yeah, women having sex with or dating men 7 or 8 years older are “normal” and treated normally, not as “younger women.” But if she’s, say, 13 years younger than you, then she certainly would be a younger woman regardless of her actual age.
A 36 year-old woman is a “younger woman” to you if you’re 57. She’s not a VYW, but she’s still younger so most of the same younger woman techniques still apply.
I’ve experienced the same, and with many women.
The more rare a trait is, the more attractive it becomes. Busy, motivated men are more rare now, so…
Yep! That is the problem. I’ve had that problem many times over the years. Alpha Male 2.0s have quality problems.
The very first man I got involved with casually was 19 years older than me–I was in my late 20s.
The 2nd man is only 4 years older, and I sometimes wish the gap was bigger. I look forward to him turning 35+–he acts like a typical millenial but still better than the 18-25 year olds I went to college with.
Males my exact same age don’t do much for me beyond their looks. They pay me no mind anyway because I look so young they assume I’m a little sister type. Older men approach me more so it works out.
I think I was a hardcore type 2 VYW and– if not for my highly religious background — I would’ve primarily dated much older men in my 20s. Teenage me said all the time that men age 30+ were the hottest of men and that teenage boys were good looking but annoying. All this just to say BD is right– straight from a Type 2‘s mouth.
The question on FOCUS is interesting.
Focus is what ties the other six principles together.
Focused on work so you have to stay later at the office or do what needs to be done. (Sacrificing short term pleasure for long term gains). She thinks that’s hot.
Confidence comes from focus. Also hot. Being fit and dressing well is a big plus here.
Focus sparks your motivation and drive. Keeping your mind set on the goal $75000 per year or what have you.
Success is another byproduct.
Having shit together… Focus
Focused on having a good time and not tolerating drama. I have little drama at this stage of life. That’s bullshit that doesn’t even enter my sphere, Any more I just stop corresponding with them. Walk away. As the older man whenever you are out with your date it’s always on your dime and you are calling the shots. They respect that so there is a lot less drama. I date girls from their early thirties to their fifties (still fit and hot) and I am super picky about anything that seems a little off. I also don’t expect to change anybody. So there are less option but higher quality. If you are able to travel, be location independent, and you can speak Spanish (or Russian, or Thai) you will have tons of options.
Young women flake so much more at this time of year!
I have a habit of putting my dark side or any perceived personal liabilities forward instantly. So at age 36, when chatting with a young college girl, I’ll refer to myself as an old , right wing, capitalist, oppressor. I’ll say all the things I actually believe, but along with saying i’m old, I’ll say that stupid people should be euthanized, everyone should have an automatic weapon at all times, etc. That’s worked a couple times lol. “Always sow confusion” was a fun art of seduction takeaway from Robert Green’s book.
As my friend once said, politics, gun control and red pill topics are ANTI-seductive. Fastest way to make a pussy dry.
Ha, I know nobody follows or cares about my stupid story, but a month or two ago, I was proud of myself for finally fucking a 38 year old plain slut (I’m 47). Today, I got shot down by a hot 21 year old. I told her what I wanted, she gave the “I’m not really looking for a partner right now,” I said “that’s fine, I’m talking to another girl right now anyway, but I did click over to you immediately, so that is what it is,” then a few hours later I continued the conversation like she hadn’t rejected me. She did not respond, and probably won’t.
I don’t know if I did everything right there. I didn’t overthink it. I really was talking to another, less desirable girl at that moment anyway. I find I do best when I’m texting two at the same time, and I don’t have time to overthink, because I’m going back and forth. Until three months ago or so, I had barely exchanged three texts with any girl, and now I’ve lost count.
The way this went down was I was at a social gathering, I found something to talk about, and I was having an animated conversation with one girl. Three others came around and got into the conversation, and then while I was in the middle of just talking to them about things like how my ex wife crossed my boundaries and I told her to move out, I realized the hotness had been talking to me for a moment. “Oh, I’m sorry, you were so quiet I didn’t hear you talking to me. What was your question?” I had the answer to her question, and we started talking, and the less pretty women faded away.
I wasn’t dressed so much better than everyone else that I looked ridiculous. There was another older white bearded man there who was dressed almost the same as me, but I was just sharper. Chicks noticed. It helped with my approach anxiety a lot.
Black dragon, you often say that older men should act their age.
I’ll soon turn 37, and I find it hard to apply your advice to my life, because I have always been the youthful type – young looking, and young acting; not deliberately young acting; I don’t try to act younger; I just don’t think I changed my demeanor in the last 10 or 15 years; I wouldn’t know how to change it. If I tried to “act my age”, it would probably come across as a combination of boring and fake.
I’m not busy or focused and I don’t have a career; I don’t want one and don’t need one since I’m what they call a trust fund kid; that is, I already have the money I need, and no reason to be the professionally driven type of person you describe. My sense of well-being and confidence comes precisely from the freedom of not having to work and being idle and carefree. Which I think is the opposite of focused and driven. As for relying on confidence and strength of personality, that is no different from what people say to guys who are 20. So what am I supposed to do?
I have been thinking of hanging around college to make friends and meet girls like I used to when I was younger. That is exactly the kind of choices you advise against, and you’ll say that it will only make me ridiculous. But even if some people find me out of place (and some other people will not – just recently a bunch of college students thought I was 25, so I still can look much younger than I am), I suspect it’s still the best way to meet very young girls. Where am I wrong?
(I’m in southern Europe, by the way, so maybe there are cultural differences).
I am 40. I have no issues dating woman between 28 and 38 mainly. I have dated and “escalated” with 27 different woman in the past 12 months. My success rate is over 90% of all woman I met and approach mainly due to the blog and BD’s articles – granted all woman I met is from online dating so they are in the market.
What I do however struggle with is to get access to woman younger than 28. Obviously being a niche market I have waited to be approached by type 2 and 3’s but this has not happened (bar a few times / one with daddy issues and one 22 year old weird chick who contacts me once every 6 weeks for a one night stand).
My point or question is where do I find these woman? Or where do they find me if that makes any sense? Maybe my “Tinder” profile is not set up correctly for younger woman? What do they like?
There are some serious younger woman at my gym but I don’t want to creep them out
how do kids enter into this picture?
If you are a 35 year old man hunting for Young Women, is the fact that you’re a Dad a detriment or not?
caleb, quick question
recently this girl had massive LMR on 2nd date (i pulled within an hour）, we kissed but no sex.
she said ‘im not going to dress jeans next time’ (implying she’s not letting me to escalate)
i tried firmly said, ”no, just follow my instruction.”
i’ve a requirement for the girls i met up, ”i like YOU to dress like a woman”
is it required to verbalize it or just show them by you looking around at beautiful women.
it disgusts me a lil when a lady wears jeans and t shirt on dates with me.
thanks
@Joe
You need exposure. I’m 34 and switching careers. I was focusing a lot on work and felt socially isolated so I took a part time job as a doorman at a trendy boutique hotel with a popular rooftop bar (major canadian city). I’m a daygame guy, and my results skyrocketed. All kinds of women but especially 18-24. I actually had to slow things down because it was getting out of control. So find a hobby or job that you like and that attracts young women also and give it a couple hours a week (yoga class, volunteering at music festivals etc)
Not a good idea.
Don’t try to act like something you’re not; that won’t work long-term. If you’re not trying to act younger, and it sounds like you’re not, then you should be okay.
Ohhhhh, now that’s different. Yes, trust fund guys tend to be less mature than other men because of exactly what you said; they don’t need to mature in order to survive and thrive, so they don’t, and stay childlike for a very long time, sometimes forever. But that gets into a topic far beyond the scope of this thread.
Online dating but not Tinder.
Not. It’s actually a huge DHV. When I was in my 30s having sex with tons of 18 and 19 year-olds it actually helped me out when I announced I had kids and I loved them. It made the women feel more safe with me, and actually helped their attraction (since some of them wanted my babies and I was clearly a good dad).
https://alphamale20.com/blackdragonblog/2016/09/15/theres-one-girl/
I’m 24 and make a six-figure income working in as an IT subcontractor, which is double what I was making as an employee in the same industry a couple of months ago. I screw hookers because I don’t desire a relationship and never have; prostitutes also allowed me to bang a large variety of super hot girls in a very short time frame… game cannot hold a candle to this level of efficiency and time saved when it comes to banging lots of hot girls. By the time I am around 30-35 I will be done sowing my wild oats and will tone the sex down to 2 hookers/fuckbuddies. I don’t plan on ever getting married and raising a family either as that will eat up so much goddamn money and time (I estimate around $1-2 million dollars and YEARS of life over the course of my lifetime), even if I do it Alpha 2.0 style; I can save that money for my old age and I also don’t have to work as hard as a married guy. Will be hedging my US dollars off into precious metals and possibly Bitcoin as dollars are quickly becoming worthless. That said, I’m probably an outlier for my age group. Life will be looking good by the time I am 30 and will just keep getting better from there. I will keep re-reading this blog for the rest of my life to make sure my mind stays strong on the Alpha 2.0 lifestyle concepts.
I realize this may apply differently to me since I’m not yet older than 35, but what the hell, figured I’d give it a shot anyway.
I’m a younger man who has his shit mostly together and is focused, driven, motivated, and still working on being fully successful. Average score of 7.5 for those. I keep my emotions in check as well as I can, probably better than most others my age, so 8. I act sufficiently mature, exude mastery in my chosen fields, and can be playful when necessary. My self-discipline could probably use some work; however, I take full responsibility for those life areas in which I’m lacking. So as far as strength of personality goes, 6.5. My confidence hovers at about 7. Now where I really shine is aversion to drama and bullshit. I consider that my strong suit, and considering the social climate, I think it’s a hugely important asset for young men to be skilled in. 9/10. I also have a bit more youthful vibe, sort of like Mr. Trustfund above, so that also comes in handy.
One thing I’d like to add is that very many (not all, but a whole lot) of young Western women nowadays are NOT looking for an Alpha AT ALL for much of the time. They want a puppydog who’ll follow them around and lick their bootheels. This is why I when I’m sarging I’ll concentrate the majority of my efforts on those who are already dating somebody, because they’re guaranteed to be either a neutered pet of a man, or another woman in which case any swinging dick will do. I realize I may be biased, and my goal is maximum results, so if anyone has input to the contrary, you’re welcome to please add it to the conversation.
The hooker vs. game debate is something for another time, but I don’t disagree with your overall points as long as you meet the two criteria I described here.
But then you say…
Exactly; therefore, they DO want an Alpha.
As I’ve been saying for over a decade, women absolutely love betas… for a while. Then they quickly get turned off and/or disgusted by them. But women are always attracted to Alphas.
The puppydog man is a temporary placeholder for a woman, but the Alpha Male is a need she will always have.
Women want Alphas.
Happy Guy Fawkes day btw.
No Gods, No Masters. 🤫🌌
BD, good point about the women always desiring Alphas. It’s a question of whether she’s single or not, and if not, is her relationship with the de facto Beta past the NRE phase? That, as well as, do you have sufficient Alpha draw in order to get her to cheat with you (a low bar, admittedly.) It’s basically timing plus your game prowess. Single young women who aren’t Disney are extremely rare, hence, go for the taken ones.
Caleb you’ve said in your previous posts that if a woman starts having sex with a man regularly he is meant to start having feelings towards him in most cases. How do you manage your oltr then?
C.
Read your comment. If you have no need of money because of a trustfund you might gain the focus through starting a nonprofit organization. Even if it is small it will bring out something your passionate about plus it adds a level of maturity, and you can donate to it as a tax writeoff!
Black Dragon: I’m a 38 year old guy who likes banging younger women. But I live in a college town and students routinely are shocked when I tell them my age. They all say that I look like I’m in my mid to late 20’s. I also have no moral qualms lying about my age to women I’m trying to bang.
So what do you think is more efficient? Lying about my age and going after type ones and threes? Or playing up the older man with his shit together aspect?
BD, do you think that the proliferation of Sugar (or Salt) Game has made it any harder to run normal game on VYW?
I don’t like lying, but I knock off seven years on my OKC profile. After I’ve met a woman in person, if she asks my age, I tell her. It’s just that women tend to think that 55 means fat, old and unhealthy, so putting my real age on my profile means I get screened out. When they meet me, it’s pretty clear I’m none of those things. They don’t generally seem to mind or even remember that the number isn’t the same as it was on the profile.
No it’s not. I always treat single and taken women equally have have no statistical difference in results when they’re under age 33.
Yes. That’s why we have the four month no-contact rule; she’ll be loyal to her new beta for about 4-6 months or so, less if she’s younger. But that’s about it.
Wow, no, completely incorrect. Women over 33 who aren’t Disney are the rare ones. Most younger women in the Western world don’t adhere to Disney at all, even though they pretend to. Read this.
I know. Most men don’t. That’s irrelevant to my point. (Morality usually is.)
What do you think my answer is?
Not yet. But that day is rapidly approaching as the West further collapses. At some point in the next few years/decades Western women will be like many Asian and South American women and start to expect some kind of financial help from any guy who wants to date them.
Like I said though, we’re not quite there yet.
Hm. I suppose I was confusing Disney with Dominant. Either way, their indoctrination to the prevalent Social Programming is strong: they wanna be the boss.
I’m a Millenial at age 31 — and yeah I know our generation has probably been dumped on the most in terms of insults. I agree that in aggregate, it probably is the softest generation to date – but what do you expect in the age of convenience, technology, comfort, and video games? And who raised this generation?
That said, we can talk about the flaws of every generation, but you shouldn’t really care. You can grow up in any culture and transcend it. It’s called social deprogramming. And if the competition your age are terrified MeTooers and feminized, well, less competition if you pump the iron and man up. No need to be a slave to your age or upbringing. That’s why you take testosterone – I’ll probably be taking it when I start losing production.
I know at 31, mid-late twenties girls have no problem with it.
Still, I’d like to get some action from the 19-21 crowd on occasion (nothing serious) so I’ll read up on your advice.
would you say vyw who are into older guys tend to be more on the hot side to the level that guys their age might be overwhelmed by their hotness etc.?
as they say, “grown”
TYPE IIs don’t advertise but there are subtle hints to pick up on their interest.
They won’t be put off by your presence where many Type Is will instantly disqualify you.
In the west, in the U.S., it’s not accepted as much. At least not overtly. Outside of there a twenty year difference is not as big an issue.
With that in mind it is good to be up front about your age because if they like you and want to date more they will want to know your age eventually. Or they will look at your passport while you are in the shower.
For me, grey was an issue. I dyed my beard and it didn’t look natural. It looked weird and then I decided “fuck it. This is what I am.” I don’t think about it anymore.
But it’s the same. Women tend to look at the inner strength, attitude and personality and some just really like older men. In terms of general trends I would say dating is moving toward the older man/younger women because the last generation definitely does not have its shit together and women’s biological (however obsolete) clocks are ticking. They want’ security and providers.
But back to the dating. The indicators of interest are the same as they always were but I think that younger girls are more comfortable with approaching you and giving you signals.
If you don’t make an issue of age they won’t. If you try to act younger you are more likely to fail.
It is often subconscious–or maybe overt and conscious–sexual desires that women want a daddy. They want to be told what to do. They want rough sex. Despite whatever public persona they may present. If you look at the stats for women’s erotica.
The genres with the biggest interest are:
Incest
Rape
Of course, that’s a fantasy and and things have to be consensual but it demonstrates their interests behind bed chamber doors.
The reason being that these are taboo but the amount of women who like this is high. Probably, like an 80/20 split.
If you are making good money and you can travel you can explore those fantasies with them.
Not necessarily but this happens a hell of a lot, yes.
Yes. That.
I expect an entire generation of left-wing socialists like you.
Exactly my entire point. Hopefully the male Millennials in my audience will not be the typical socialist pot smoking video game porn addicts bitching about rich people and hoping Bernie Sanders will give them a bunch of free stuff while they sit on their asses and watch YouTube. At least that is my hope. We’ll see.
And yes, my generation (Gen X) was absolutely dreadful and the Baby Boomers were even worse. Doesn’t make anything I (or others) have said about the Millennials less true.
What’s that saying in Japan about the tall blade of grass? Yeah, for those Millennial men of strong mind and body, it’s a virtual buffet. Still it sucks because it’s a terminal society, but hey, I’ll be poolside. 😎 Whenever I do dip my toes into the VYW meatmarket, it’s clear that things ain’t gonna get better for now.
BD, I’ve always appreciated your work since I found it. Let me be clear: I completely understand and respect your focus on helping average dudes.
Also, I’m using judo john for consistency, but I haven’t been on the mat for a while, because fuck getting permanently injured. I traded judo for swing dancing and found a great community. I have a barbell in my apartment. Looks wise for our age, I’m not remotely average. You’re not wrong that we need to compete with dudes our age, but I compete with the kids, at least physique wise.
I’m not a meathead, but the college athlete physique, the v-taper, well, I’m doing well. Financially, I’m fucked and can’t spend money on women.
Here it is: Outside of my unicorn, I met a chick in college I’m “friends” with on Facebook. She put up a pic of her father holding her when she was a toddler, and he was a proper dirtbag wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt who would have fit in with us just fine.
I haven’t had a haircut in like 6 months. I’m going for the rock star look. I dance hard, well, and athletically. I have most of my hair, absolutely streaked with gray. As Uncle V would say, rock out with your cock out.
Thoughts? I know it’s niche, but not a bad one, right? So many women of fuckable age had fathers that were indistinguishable from us when we were young, so be as close to that as we can be.
I wonder which type of VYWs would college chicks be in? I live right next to a giant university and I can tell that these college chicks really don’t want dudes their age by the way they look at me haha.
As far as the qualities listed, Here are my rankings:
Confidence = With VYWs I’d put it at a 7 or so. I can chat with them fine but I struggle when it comes to getting them out on dates/having sex with them. Meh.
Strength of personality = 10. People always compliment me on being kind and polite while also having boundaries, which is what I imagine strength of personality is.
Motivation/Drive = These days its 8 or 9. I do enjoy the occasional day off, but if I want something really bad I will sacrifice the stuff I *like* for it.
Success = 2, I’m still practically living paycheck to paycheck at 37 but that’s changing pretty fast. By mid 2020 this won’t be an issue anymore.
Focus = 10, probably 11 or 12 at times lol. I’m capable of developing a focus that is so strong that it can scare some people haha.
Shit together = Probably 5 or so. I’m not perfect, but at least I’m not couch surfing or homeless or something. Ehh I know I can get my shit together much better.
Zero tolerance = At least 10. Hell I can bump this up to 20 if I need to lol. I have zero tolerance for anybody’s BS and will straight up stop talking to them if I sense even a shred of negativity or even one inaccurate accusation that is meant to get a rise out of me. But then again I’m the type who always argues that drama is anything that is negative in a relationship, which is an observation that BD always attacks, so meh.
Although I’m Gen X, I have a need to go to bat for the millennial generation here. If Gen X and especially the Baby Boomers had ANY of the technology we had today…holy shit. Boomers already had rock hard dicks and sopping wet vaginas for activism 50 some odd years ago, can you imagine the orgy of degenerate activism they would be drowning in if social media etc was around in the 1960s and 1970s? The Boomers would have straight up turned the US into some weird variation of North Korea and current day west Europe.
The millennial generation does have their negative qualities, but let’s be honest and blame it on how convenient it is to just spew out opinions like typewritten diarrhea via the internet and social media which became more and more convenient when the millennial generation came of age.
Not gonna argue against focus but you chose one of the worst possible and most bullshit examples imaginable. Staying long in the office is terrible time management and should never be done unless its really your hobby or you are going to get paid insane money for overtime. Otherwise it just says low productivity and low efficiency at work and “I am a company slave who will do whatever they want so that they are happy.” Very, very beta. Always do the minimum required to accomplish a goal. If in employment with fixed salary that means minimal work and hours required. Of course if self employed and working on some new project that is exciting and or high gain potential, or when working for someone else but commission based,especially with huge potential earnings then that is entirely different and I agree completely. However I am getting the vibes of fixed salary employee from this which means you always wanna be doing the minimum. Then use the rest of that time and focus on some other things ,for example getting more money from another source / building a side business / getting more sex etc.
I find that it still works very well for men over 30 provided you change your age. Of course then comes the trouble of when do you tell her etc. But if you are looking for mainly FBs it doesn’t really matter so much. I find that as a man over 30 Tinder is not very good when using real age in general and forget women under 25. With adjusted age I can easily score mid twenties and often under 24s also. Still working on my approach with them – I struggle with the patience required to manage they’re bullshit and the fact they need more time to converse and get scared more easily. Honestly women are so immature as well these days – early 20s and they are often scared of dating / meeting someone / just don’t date because “they have time”. I don’t remember women being like that 10 years ago when I was early 20s. Is this also a part of the western collapse?
Correct, Most women I dated even somewhat dominant admitted they were either into this or slightly liked the idea. Some even told me “this is every woman’s fantasy”.
I indeed find that the older I get the less I tolerate both from women I date and also from people I work with. However I find it to be detrimental with younger women because they do require a lot of patience and time (compared to older women), in the pre sex stage, which I have now even less than before. I also am getting to the point where I genuinely feel I know better and can advice and guide others and find it hard not to lecture everyone.
OK Boomer
Sorry, couldn’t resist.
Hey BD, I’ve just noticed something you might wanna fix about your blog’s dark mode.
The hyperlinks are evident in light mode but are the same color as the surrounding text in dark mode, not a huge issue but I’m sure you know how that effects your traffic.
If it’s 100% congruent to who you are, go for it. If you’re doing it just as a technique get chicks, then no.
All three.
Sorry, I’m not a Boomer. Not even close. I’m right in the middle Gen X.
My generation sucks ass, but the Boomers were much worse, perhaps the worst American generation in the last 150 years. But I digress.
Yeah, I see that too. Thanks; I’ll get my tech guys on it.
Update: My staff just fixed it. Refresh your page.
While you’re on website fixes, the Comments links on the site homepage below the article precis don’t go the comments, they all go to the top of the respective article page.
And we don’t have a list of latest comments (which you said you would implement), meaning I have to remember the exact number of comments made on each article to know of there are any new ones without clicking through.
I’m 56, fit and am told that I’m handsome. On woman recently told me that I’m “an eight.” I’m recently divorced from a miserable 23 year marraige.
I’m in the process of moving for a new job. About a month ago I was there interviewing and matched with a 20 year old on Bumble who has never had sex with an older man and wants to very much. She also wants to bring two friends at different times for threesomes. One is 18 and one is 19. They are all sexy from their pics, the 18 year old especially. When I get moved early next month I’ll see if it’s all talk or attention seeking. She has kept the lines of communication open since mid October, so it seems she’s serious.
I’ll keep you all posted.
Ed, sounds too good to be true – I would strongly suspect a scammer.
The best test is to arrange a meet once you get to your new town. If she evades, or flakes, then you’ll know.
Be careful – scammers are masters at stringing people along. They can come up with all kinds of plausible stories for why they can’t meet with you., just to keep you on the hook. Don’t fall for it.
But on the off chance she’s real – have fun!
Thanks. I’ve encountered a number of scammers online dating. She’ll never get my credit card number.
Ah, yes. I’ll have that fixed ASAP.
Ehhhh I don’t think I said I’d implement that (though my memory could be wrong). I think I said I didn’t want to do that but that I might do it later.
The problem is that I don’t know where I’d physically put something like that without cluttering the screen. I like my clutter-free blogs.
re: list of latest comments
The usual way to do it: cluttering the main page with the whole section which shows links to latest comments.
So perhaps a non-cluttery way to do it: putting a small link somewhere on the main page which leads to a separate page with a list of latest comments? Just a thought.
(One good thing about such a list would be that interesting comments to old blog posts would have a better chance of being seen by people.)
Nope, you said you’d do it, here: https://alphamale20.com/blackdragonblog/2019/04/02/announcing-new-blackdragon-blog-and-new-alpha-male-2-0-forums/
Got it. Don’t hold your breath though.
While we are on the topic of younger women/older men…
I am seriously considering giving Seeking Arrangement a try… but I want to get the most bang for my buck (see what I did there? I can hear the groans now)
I know results can vary a lot based on the season. Would I get better results now– mid November, pre-Christmas/New Year’s?
Or would I be better off waiting till after the new year?
I have not tried sugar game myself but I messed around on the free version of the site for a while and I think most traffic and messages were mid winter and early spring, but not sure. In general normal dating is best after christmas / at the start of the second semester in university towns (which also has september till about now ish excellent time). So I guess it does depend on where you live a lot. Mid winter should be good regardless.
Blackdragon, doing this prediction you take into consideration the rise of sex robots? They will change everything, so what you are predicting here would be true only if there will not be sex robots, but there will be.
Wait until after New Years.
Very true and good point. The problem is that you and I don’t know the precise timing of when A) sex robots will look and feel 100% human and be cheap enough for the typical average-income Joe to purchase and B) when all normal women will expect financial help just to have sex or date.
If A happens before B, then you’re right and men will be fine. But it probably won’t. (Though that’s just a guess on my part; again, we don’t know.)
I think we are close to having robots that look and feel real (ish) in maybe a few years but affordable I am not sure if that will be in our lifetime. The materials required to make something look and feel realistic are usually not cheap materials and you need quite a lot. I cannot imagine any realistic scenario where this can be something an average Joe can ever afford anytime in the next several decades, but let’s see.
B could happen in about 10 years or sooner in many places. Though in his examples like Asia and Latin America – these are places where you can get laid and have dates without paying for more than her drinks, no problem. The key is that she thinks you are rich and you’re all game. To keep her long term that might be a different story though. Also in those places guys who don’t have money (especially latin america) get laid no problem. So I don’t think we well ever have that its a standard but it will get more common. I have seen and talked to women in societies and cultures where it is or was in the past very bad economically and many women either thought they could use a man this way or were even dependent on it and it is not the typical gold diggers who expect you to buy her latest cosmetics or ask for cash, it’s more that she’s hoping to have a rich boyfriend / to marry rich or at least reasonably well off so that she doesn’t need to worry about money. If you can demonstrate that’s what you are you won’t need to pay anything other than a first date drink and can probably keep her long term even if you dont make much effort or spend much on her. If anything it should get easier as long as you have some money.
Im 29 and even at my age ive noticed most of the girls I get are not younger than say 22 and ive had 22 year olds saying 29 is old. And ive been told i look 25. So I imagine it would be very difficult for a guy in his mid 30s and older to get young girls..well hot high value ones anyways..theres alot of unattractive young girls that might go for any age. Just my experience. And im 6 foot. Hit the gym and been told im good looking.
I just turned 40 last month. This year alone, without putting too much effort or going out a lot, I’ve slept with five new chicks between ages 19 and 25 who are considered cute by the majority of men. I did that without using sugar daddy game or anything of that sort. If I had more free time that number could be three times higher at least.
Plus I also had three different chicks between the ages of 18 and 21 sexting me for months on end (I had to block them because my phone was full of titties and asses they were sending me).
Now do the math.
Factually incorrect. I have spent the last 13 years as a man over age 35 getting women 18-23 who are not just cute, but hot as hell, and with less than $27 spent per woman to do it for most of them. Been doing that from age 35 to age 47, and I only started introducing sugar daddy game to the mix in my mid-40s.
Literally thousands of my readers have done the same thing or close to it.
Read this book.
I guess ill just have to see what happens when im older than 35..
And I just want to apologize for my previous comment.. because theres 2 ways guys can go about it..
A. Limit themselves by thinking “i cant get younger women” so they dont even try
Or B. Try the best they can.
Person B will have higher odds regardless of age right.
This goes the same for anything in life. Success is your attitude and going after what you want in life not the attainment of that goal.
Have a good day everyone.